+----------------------------------------------------------------------+ | The Olympia Times issue g1-36 | | March 1, 1995 | | | | turn 36 188 players "Rent this space" | +----------------------------------------------------------------------+
Questions, comments, to play: email@example.com
* * *
If you imagine, in so far as it is approximately possible, the sum total of distress, pain and suffering of every kind which the sun shines upon in its course, you will have to admit it would have been much better if the sun had been able to call up the phenomenon of life as little on the earth as on the moon...
* * *
A new researchable skill has been added to the Stealth category:
Skill: Conceal identity of trader 
This skill allows a trader to conceal his identity when dealing with a market. By working through middlemen and employing shady contacts, the trader will not reveal his identity to the other party to his transaction, or to the market at large.
To use this skill, the trader should supply a "1" flag as the fifth argument to the BUY or SELL command. Note that The first four arguments must be specified; use "0" for have-left if it is to be left as the default.
For example, to conceal one's identity when selling 10 pots for 2 gold each, issue the order:
sell 95 10 2 0 1
If the conceal trade flag is supplied, but the character does not know @@@@, the BUY or SELL order will fail.
Western Drucartan yatata yatata yatta blah blah don't come here yeah yeah yeah severe communicable hydrocephalism outbreak nothing here anyway sure, uh-huh don't force me to kill you, and on and on
(The preceding abridgement was brought to you by the Olympia Society for the Termination of Obviously Previously Iterated Timesposts ["O STOP IT"], a union of concerned citizens formed to lessen the volume of necessary repetition in the Olympia Times. Contribution to this effort can be effected by drastically editing any post you have previously submitted to the times that you feel you must repost, or by, god forbid, rewriting, changing, or replacing such post.)
"When life gets too hard, and you just need a break, followed by several days of memory loss, wracking abdominal pain, partial blindness, uncontrollable sweating, permanent aphasia, incontinence, episodic paranoia, and loss of sensation in the extremities, it's time for Revelstone (tm) brand Orc Oil!"
-- Lords of Revelstone [ad4]
To anyone sailing from the IC anytime soon: I will pay for passage. Amount depends on where you're headed. Contact Shadowalkers [br9] for more information.
-- Shadowalkers [br9]
"Here, master. What cheer?"
"Good! Speak to th' mariners; fall to 't yarely, or we run
ourselves aground; bestir, bestir."
"Heigh my hearts! Cheerly, cheerly, my hearts! Yare, yare! Take in
the topsail. Tend to th' master's whistle. Blow till thou burst thy
wind, if room enough."
-- Draconian Elite [fg4]
> I, Thales, Lord of Amnon-Re, was long an adherant of the > Flat World Society, and kept company with one Oleg the > Loudmouth, whose name is so well practiced by the writers > of this journal.
> I therefore renounce my affiliation with The Flat Earth Society, > and particularly with those who would cloak their hostile intent > in righteousness. > > Thales, Duke of Amnon-Re > > -- Thales [e8q]
All Thales has seen is the depth of the AOO pocketbook. It is amazing what you can get someone to say if you pay them enough money.
The Flat Earth Society has never maligned the AOO. Our association with Oleg, was to book passage to Tollus. We then settled as far from Oleg as possible. Up until this date, we had not contributed to the war with the AOO, but now that we see what the AOO is truly about, this will all change. It is a shame that the AOO assumes that everyone who has been seen with Oleg is their enemy. I guess that when they act on the assumption that everyone is their enemy, eventually everyone will be.
-- The Flat World Society [ks3]
Starting next turn, the Illustrated Man will be selling PIKEMEN, for the low, low price of only 23 gold! Supplies will be limited, but more will be arriving each turn, so order yours today! Only in the Imperial City, only from the Illustrated Man!
-- The Midnight Carnival [nx2]
"I don't know how I ever gamed without it!" -- The Circle of Hope
"Very pleasing to the eye!" -- Ashcraft
"Got them, they're great! No more having to switch windows to peer at an ASCII map!" -- Faction Amber
"These aren't just maps, they're works of art!" -- B. Altmiller, new player.
"The maps are cool!" -- R. Skrenta
"The maps far exceeded my expectations; any new player will likely find the information contained exceedingly valuable.... I am especially impressed by the clarity." -- Crimson Sage
MAPS MAPS MAPS
I am now currently assembling data for the second major revision of the maps, which will include more information on Western Provinia, Krussos, the Ossicus/Tollus strait, West Camaris, and more! Revisions will be available to my current customers for half price; for everyone else, the price will go up. This will happen within the next few months, so if you want your map at the cheeper price, get yours today!
Likewise, I am especially interested in gathering information from the far flung corners of the world for the second edition. If you've been thinking about sending me mapping data in exchange for a map, now's the time -- otherwise you may have to wait months to see your area in print.
Remember, newbies flock to blank spaces on the map like flies to honey! But if they see that your area is mapped, they'll know someone is there already, and they'll be more likely to explore elsewhere! Mapping is the best way of keeping your privacy!
What are these maps? They are drawn in 7 colors, with graphical symbols representing all kinds of terrain and internal locations. They are available by surface mail only, when you pay the Illustrated Man (s5e) 50 gold in the Imperial City, or send me the terrain of ten provinces. I will send you a map of Provinia, and a map of the entire known world as well.
EXTRA DEALS!!!>>> We will make custom maps! Let us know the size, scale and quantity of any maps you want made, and we'll quote you a price! Want a blowup of your kingdom five pages wide by five pages high? Write the Illustrated Man (s5e) and we'll talk!
This offer brought to you by...
The Midnight Carnival ___ ||||| /\ =====----`==== oo oo /\ /\
-- The Midnight Carnival [nx2]
+------------------------------------------------------------+ | ADVERTISEMENT ADVERTISEMENT ADVERTISEMENT ADVERTISEMENT AD | +------------------------------------------------------------+
Tired of remembering the code number for "Perform Common Tasks for Gold?" Ever lose valuable time because you inverted those pesky numbers in orders? Ever drop the wrong item? Nothing like issuing "drop 1 95" instead of "drop 95 1" to ruin your whole month! If this has ever happened to you, you need - DISPATCHomatic!
DISPATCHomatic is a Perl script which replaces English words with Olympia codes. DISPATCHomatic provides some syntax checking, and can also mail the orders automatically*!
What does all of this cost you? 500 gold? Less. 200 gold? No. DISPATCHomatic is ABSOLUTELY FREE.
Send email to Mandrake
with five province reports not in the Atlas, and I'll send you the program. If you send a city report, or 10 province reports not in the atlas, I'll provide free automatic updates as I improve the program.
*DISPATCHomatic has only been tested on Un*x workstations. The Perl utility is required.
+------------------------------------------------------------+ | ADVERTISEMENT ADVERTISEMENT ADVERTISEMENT ADVERTISEMENT AD | +------------------------------------------------------------+
-- Mandrake's Marauders [sj1]
NOTICE is hereby given that the city of Branwen, along with nearby environs on the Island of Allasus, are the domain of The Gonthorian Adventurers. Specifically, this includes the provinces of ct03-cv06 and cw03-cx05. The designated overseer of these lands is Darrien Esterior [z8j]. Having legally been granted this fiefdom by the noble King-Claimant Tiglath, we are one of the factions collectively referred to as The Lords of Allasus. With prior notification, peaceful visitors are welcome in our lands. Arrival without prior notification is most unwise.
-- Gonthorian Adventurers [so9]
Most of the monsters we have sighted seem to be ones which cannot be battled except with artifacts. This may explain why they are still present as some artifacts could be difficult to obtain. The maps of the southern swamps have been recently updated so we may find little to explore that is still unknown.
-- Seekers of Knowledge [tt4]
----------------------- S. CAMARIS Update -----------------------
Ah, another quiet turn. Currents seem to be spiralling in tightening eddies...
-- Compte du S. Camaris [b4q]
-- The Crazy Quilters [vn7]
This is monthly notice if you wish to visit the environs of Cycarth and Redwine please be courteous enough to let m9l know (you can reach him at firstname.lastname@example.org. I do not currently plan to restrict access, but would like to know who is wandering around in my front yard. I would especially like to know if you plan on using any of the natural rsources (peasants, wood, and the like) in the provinces bt25 bt26 bt27 bu25 bu26 bu27 bv25 bv26 bv27 bw25 bw26 and bw27.
By order of Darkman, caretaker of Dark Castle
-- Dweezil [e5q]
PILGRIMS AID SOCIETY
To new factions joining Olympia: WELCOME! The Pilgrims Aid Society offers free advice and assistance to all nobles.
I have been experiencing some technical difficulties lately which have prevented me from answering my mail as quickly as I would like. These difficulties are expected to persist for the next few months. Please do not become alarmed if I do not immediately answer your mail. Placing URGENT in the subject line will help me speed a reply to you.
-- Akmall Benhalla [p3p]
In spite of recent rumors North West Ossicus is far from empty. Please register yourself before entering.
-- Lothar [d4x]
It may be slow building castles from deserts, but far far better late than never!
-- Corlin Singer [n0i]
Soon the world will see the wisdom of our visions. As our skill increases so too will the clarity and value of our predictions. This month's forecast is... (drum roll please)...the world will NOT end tomorrow! (we're still a little new at this). Stay tuned as we polish our crystal ball.
-- Nostradamus [w8i]
Advertisement!!!! Have too much research to do? Farm the work out! I will sell hard-to find weathermagic spells in the Imperial City environs! Spells only, I will not sell Weathermagic itself. Serious inquiries only please.
I also need lana bark in the Imperial City environs. I will pay for unprocessed or otherwise lana bark. Let's get this economy rolling.
-- Dixtheus [e3i]
The Olympia Atlas is accepting contributions, and is available for download! Be the first to contribute information for unexplored lands (Faery).
In the tradition of Oleg's Map (tm), the Atlas is a compilation of geographical information useful for explorers, traders, and adventurers. Best of all, it's absolutely free!
To contribute to the Atlas, simply send turn excerpts (cut out all the incriminating parts) that contain the following information:
o) Mapping data (region & route info) o) City market reports o) City skills lists o) Inner locations
and send it to email@example.com. We'll include it into the next version of the Atlas.
The Atlas is available by ftp from your nearest PBM ftp site (ftp.erg.sri.com in the USA, check the PBM FAQ for other sites), in the directory /pub/pbm/olympia, as atlas.X, where X is the turn of the last update.
The Atlas is also available on the PBMGames forum on CompuServe, in the fantasy games section, as atlas.oly.
Brought to you by the Skulking Vermin (sx6)
-- Sludge [x0o]
************************************ * Apollo The Bard's Balladry Board * ************************************
The Lady of Shalott by Alfred, Lord Tennyson continues
A bow-shot from her bower-eaves, He rode between the barley-sheaves, The sun came dazzling thro' the leaves, And flamed upon the brazen greaves Of bold Sir Lancelot. A red-cross knight for ever kneel'd To a lady in his shield, That sparkled on the yellow field, Beside remote Shalott.
The gemmy bridle glitter'd free, Like to some branch of stars we see Hung in the golden Galaxy. The bridle bells rang merrily As he rode down to Camelot: And from his blazon'd baldric slung A mighty silver bugle hung, And as he rode his armor rung, Beside remote Shalott.
*********************** * continued next week * ***********************
-- Apollo [t2t]
Journal - Blossom bloom, Year 5
Head west young man. That's what the note says. We will try again to join our companions.
The Lord of the Morning, The Dragon,
-- Lews Therin Telamon [m3m]
The Brotherhood of Ormos claims the city of Avalon [ao0k] and all lands and resources inside the boundary of [bp05]-[bp08]-[br06] -[br09] inclusive, as its sole and lawful demense. Those wishing to visit Ormos are required to request a visa and await clearance before attempting to make landfall. All unauthorized visitors are unwelcome and looked upon with extreme prejudice. Captains needing to make landfall at Avalon for emergency repairs will not be molested, but are still required to contact me for a visa.
-- Pelinore Dragonslayer [p4s]
Visitors are welcome to the area controlled by the Cohorts of Colossus [vo4], as long as they obtain travel permits first. Not all requests will be granted. The affected area includes the land provinces bounded by bx25 and bz27.
To avoid possible misunderstandings, do not enter this area without a permit.
-- Sheriff Pelenth of Gentlewind [f3i]
Attention all Ossicians! We are coming & we are many. We only want peace with our neighbors and our own little corner of the continent. All Ossicians are encouraged to contact me so that we may devise ways to be friendly neighbors with one another. Also, we don't want to land in your front yard: we want our own front yard. Let's get the settling of this continent off on the right foot!
PS: thanks to all those who have contacted me already.
-- Norc of Trivendale [z1a]
I am looking for any Olympia related documents or files that you would like publicly accessibile at a new site loctated at http://www.io.com/user/matrix/olympia or by anon ftp at io.com pub/mud/olympia which is still in a test phase. Please mail to firstname.lastname@example.org with any possible submissions.
-- Deek [e9b]
Chateau Olympique is home to a sniveling mama's boy who behaves traitorously and violently and who cries like a baby when his early demise is called for in retaliation for his senseless attacks. 1000 gold to the first noble to kill him!
-- Captain Tarkus [c1s]
They say that a level 10 mine in one location can connect to a level 10 mine in another.
They say that a herd of nazgul can beat a flight of dragons if properly equipped.
They say that different storms may actually battle with each other.
Don't people say a lot of things
Miyuki sez: "The difference between kinky and perverted is that kinky is using a feather - perverted is using the whole chicken."
I hope you liked the pome, Now it's time to go home!
The Lords of Faery have decided to revoke the protection of elfstones. Mortals in faery are not welcome and will be attacked without warning when encountered -- The Faery Hunt [cu6b]
Q: What's red, white, and blue, and is all crunchy inside?
A: Oleg the Loudmouth, wrapped in the flag, being roasted over the flames by the AOO.
That which does not kill me makes me stronger. Oops. Oh well, that which kills me lets me restart :)
Whose crown rests unsettled? Now, why does everyone look at Marat?
Sorcen skulked around the brown savannah, sniffing now and then for scent of death he had become so accustomed to. He came upon the bones suddenly, as they were hidden in the depression near a small stream.
"Here, my masters! Here, come and smash the boneys! Smash them!"
Soren began dancing wildly around the bones, his grey beard and hair swinging out as he cackled.
What's a drittsekk when it's at home, anyway?
"The Turtle Moves"
Clifford knows where ROSE PERFUME can be sold. So try Clifford's City Market Database: 89 city market reports, including where YOU can sell rose perfume. Send in a city market report not yet in the database and you will receive a report each week on the commodity of your choice, with the rose perfume commodity report thrown in for free. For further info, write to email@example.com.
Fates! Here lie dragons! I wonder if they breed well. Wouldn't that be nice?
Ah, it's good to be on land again. Now, to meet the local nobility and see what they think of my quarrying their mountains...
verse 2: The Sword of Justice balances the pans Of right and wrong, and foul and fair. Eye for an eye, Doomgiver scans The fate of all folk everywhere. The Complete Book of Swords by Saberhagen
Has anyone noticed an advantage to having a higher skill level in a discipline? For example, the rules say that a ship may be constructed quicker by an experienced shipwright as opposed to an apprentice. Does anyone have specific evidence they could share as independent verification? -The Enquirer
The city was nearly empty. The few merchants that were to be seen were taciturn and uncommunicative. The local populace knew nothing of outside of that city. They seemed almost completely ignorant that they were even in a forest. They did not have any answers to the questions they were asked.
All they could say was there were more cities, close by.
The gaunt man sighed. "I suppose we'll have to go there, and ask the same questions."
Bandits infest the lands of Faery. No land is safe!
What do you mean those Giant Spiders can only defeated by using a certain magic shield? What do I do, hit them with it? Fortunately my buddy has that magic shield so I just have to borrow it and then go after the spiders!
Obscure People and Ways of Olympia. It has been asked, Why is it, that rats are so often carrying gold ? Again we can thank that most amusing of races the orcs.
Like many races, Orcs keep pets. Orcs in keeping with their personal hygiene prefer rats as pets,though it has been argued that because of their comparative intelligence, that it just might be the rats that are keeping the orcs as pets, but it is doubtful that even a rat would keep something as filthy as an orc as a pet. Now sometimes an orc, particularly old female orcs, the type with wispy blue fur, will dress their pet rats in orc clothing designed to fit a rat. So when you find a rat in chain mail, helmet and hobnail boots with a small purse of gold, you have found a pet that has wandered away from its orc master.
It seems that a building loses its defensive bonus before it starts taking any damage in combat, and also does not give any bonus until it's fully built. However, it's not clear what happens when it's being razed: the bonus may decline in proportional to the damage, or it may vanish as soon as any is inflicted. Does anybody have first- hand experience on this question?
My fears have been confirmed. I have been picked up by a bunch of stinking dopplegangers! Well now that I know, I shall do my best to escape them. My attempts at contacting my true allies have been only slightly successful. Well we shall see how I fare next month.
Are you tired of the hastle of starting an new faction? Confused about the various necessities of an adventurer's life? Find it inefficient to train all those nobles just to get started? Find life in the Imperial City too confusing?
Watch for the The Newbie Starter's Kit!!
Soon to arrive at an Imperial City near you!
Sailing sailing sailing sailing... Ho hum...hum ho... Seems wherever you go in this world, You can stand and fight or just keep sailing, Drowned in the waves, Or drowned in blood, Somehow I'm always wet...
* Market Survey: I am interested in the further profits of bounty hunting. Serious reward offers considered. Satisfactory payment procedures required. Please submit "serious offers". Killing off the AOO Castle Boss "Marat" for only 1000 gold is not serious. An OLD Book that teaches Necromancy, 10 Mithril, and 2000 gold is getting warm. Easier targets will command a smaller fee. I will contact you directly if I am willing to pursue your target. I am currently completing a contract and will be available in 1 turn. * Low Profile Bounty Hunters
I too am against the oppressive AOO, but all I have seen (save Oleg's heroic stand) are people whining in the Times. "Cant we band together and do something?" they say. Well, until someone steps forward to lead the rest of us more humble (yet loyal) nobles then the AOO will continue to grow unchecked.
- a scared but getting madder by the minute anonymous noble
A notice for newcomers to Provinia. The resources in bx23 are being used at the direction of Duke Marat. Bellabane [o3z] Forester of the Wheel
I asked him what we could expect to find once we finally made landfall in Ossicus, but all he did was say "Clean up Armenia! Get a harelip!" and fall to the ground clutching himself, convulsed with laughter. I can't believe how much gold I paid him for this.
_Song of the Expatriates_
My fair lass! My fair lass, -I've come to say good-bye, love; To Tollus I sail away at dawn -My fortune for to try, love. The cause is lost without repair, -All hope has now departed; And the Nation's gallant chivalry, -Is scatter'd brokenhearted. Ah! Pleasant are our Cyrkarth vales, -Encrowned in summer dew, love, But now no more the autumn gales -Unfold the flags of peace, love, And say, could we remain and see -In ruin and dishonor Far o'er Gentlewind waving free -The foeman's black-heart banner! No, sweeter in far lands to roam -From Newleaf's green banks and thee, love Than live a coward-slave at home -To plighted vows untrue, love, And better ne'er to grasp thy hand -Or view those tresses shining, Than 'mong the cravens of the land -Crouch down in fetters pining!
Fair lass! 'tis hard to part from thee, -My heart's bright pearl, my own love, And wandering in a far country, -To leave you sad and lone, love! But spring's young flowers will crown the glen, -And wreath the Faery wildwood, And the Nation's feet will pace again -The Olympus of my childhood. Farewell, farewell, my fair lass, -Time flies, I must away, love; 'Twill soon be dawn, 'twill soon be dawn, -My steed begins to neigh, love; Farewell, preserve thine heart as true, -As changeless as yon river, And the Nation will be true to you, -Anear, afar - forever!
Has the AAO made public a list of its proud membership?
PLUNDERER'S THEME (to Supercalifragilisticexpialidocius)
Pillage, rape, and loot and burn, but all in moderation. If you do the things we say, then you'll soon rule the nation. Kill your foes and enemies and then kill your relations. Pillage, rape, and loot and burn, but all in moderation.
If the AAO is such an upstanding and proud group, why don't they make their membership public?
Wide open plains with cloudy skies overhead. The air smells like electricity.
Don't be a fool! That was a prelude to invasion! Gear up to a total war economy while you have a chance!
A little bird tells me that Zarra is up to no good.
Sailor: Sir, what are we searching for? Taira: We're searching for the lost island of Atlantis! Sailor: Isn't that in the next seazone over? Taira: Er, yes, but the light's better over here.
How much longer shall the inhabitants of this realm suffer under the oppressive thumb of the AOO? Surely if we band together we can take them! United we are strong, divided we are weak.
OK, it's a fair cop, we ARE the Bad Guys. What's it to you, buster? -- The AOO
That's it, Oleg! starve 'em to death! Soon their grandchildren won't be able to have seconds!
All ye beware! Osswid hereby claims the entire continent of Provinia as his rightful domain. Those who trespass here without his permission will come to a GRAVE end!
Concerning the problem of too much weight after combat. Use a loot-keeper noble. After the attack order, the stack leader issues give orders for all imaginable unwanted items to the loot-keeper, who must not be a member of the same stack. The attack stack can then move on and the loot-keeper can check the value of any loot before dropping it. The loot-keeper might remain very stationary....
Olympian Order of Miyuki Fans (OOMF) report on The 1st Annual MIYUKI-O-RAMA-THON!
Many thanks to all of you who generously contributed bail money for the OOMF members that were being held in the Imperial City jail. Court dates for their trial will be posted in the Times in case anyone wants to drop by and cheer them on in court.
As mentioned in last months Times, the party was a huge success, with several fatalities and dozens of permanent injuries being confirmed.
According to eyewitness accounts, the bulk of the carnage came when someone in the crowd shouted "Look! By the docks! It's Miyuki!", which triggered a mad stampede of drugged out fans all trampling over each other trying to get a glimpse of this legendary figure (or of her legendary figure).
As it turns out it was just some Blond bimbo in drag trolling for winos on her way back from "Rubber Novelty Night" at Charley's Bar-&-Other-Things.
By the time the few coherent fans in the crowd realized the mistake it was too late. The mass of humanity, propelled by its own momentum, washed out over the docks and fell into the cold night sea, where a lucky few drowned before being devoured by the carnivorous amphibians that haunt Provinia's nocturnal shores.
All in all, we think that The 1st Annual MIYUKI-O-RAMA-THON lived up to its promise of "Tons 'O Fun" and we look forward with eager anticipation to next years wild and crazy bash which promises to be bigger, better and even more mindlessly destructive! See you there!
In other Miyuki news:
"Big Al" Tennyson posts steamy sonnet "Ode to Miyuki" in Times #8. Alfred, Lord Tennyson writes serialized epic "The Lady of Shalott".
Coincidence? We think not. Sordid details next month.
And yea, verily, it came to pass that the clouds parted and a voice from above spaketh unto the poor confused Duke Thales... "Behold, for it is written: 'though one accused is innocent until proven guilty, the law is not necessarily justice, nor is justice necessarily legal.'" "uhhh, wot?" mumbled the dull witted Duke Thales. "Scry true the runes of Times long past for therein lingers the foul stench of treachery left behind by Antique Odors of Olympians." "duhhh, huh?" replied the bewildered Duke Thales. "Heed well the voice of one crying out in the wilderness 'Let my Oleg go!'" "ummm, hello?" squeaked the hopelessly befuddled Duke Thales. "Pah! Thou fool." spaketh the voice. "May ye richly reap the harvest sown by thine own ignorance."