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   +----------------------------------------------------------------------+
   | The Olympia Times                                       issue g2-108 |
   | March 9, 1999                                                        |
   |                                                                      |
   | turn 108  306 players                            http://www.pbm.com/ |
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Olympia PBEM

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Player-contributed press


Just a reminder that the Brotherhood of the Red God is harrassing the Lord's shipping and naval troop movements in the Camaris Straits. All neutral ships in the waters between Camaris and Provinia east of the 50 longtitude line running through Harn should contact us so you are not caught up in this conflict. Any ships in these waters that have not contacted us will be considered hostile till we have determined otherwise.

We currently have Brothers in the Drassa region with little to do. We are currently looking for contracts of any sort (training, recruiting, raiding, patrol duty, etc) in this area or any of the nearby islands. We have ship transport and don;t mind travelling.

Please visit our web site at www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/1843/borg.html or contact us at asgardian@bigfoot.com

May the Red God smile upon you. The Herald of the Brotherhood of the Red God

-- Wodan [d987]


It has been almost 3 years since our silent neighbours in Southern Atnos first attacked us, but we believe the end to be in site. Until we announce an official end to the hostilities however, our lands should still be considered a war zone. Any nobles entering our lands will be considered hostile unless we hear otherwise.

By right of conquest, in addition to our declaration in Times #88, the Greater Northern Atnos Traders now claim the following land on Atnos:

Row cf and everything north of it on Atnos. Rows cg through cm, columns 89 to 97.

As a final note, we would like to confirm our Treaty of Mutual Aid with our friends the Southwest Tollus Company. It is hoped that alliances such as this will discourage the type of blatant war mongering we have been forced to endure thus far.

On behalf of the Greater Northern Atnos Traders, I am

-- Zaltazar [1413]


Mercenaries Wanted!

Are there any factions out there interested in taking on some mercenary work? I am looking for a few (well, a lot actually) good men to do some raiding, shipping disruption, undercover work, magical combat, and information gathering. I can afford to pay handsomely, and guarantee excitement, glory, and the chance to make enemies for--what may end up being a short but satisfying-- life! Please contact me through the mystical messaging service if you are interested.

-- Ming the Merciless [2900]


Rumors


Having noted with interest the recent vociferous debate taking place between the fine and gentle nobles of this many splendoured land, I have taken it upon myself to address the question at hand: the finer points of Olympian ethics as defined by and through philosophy. However, upon turning to the works of the great thinkers, I found that the texts that form the very philosophical base of our culture have been stolen or burned in the ferocious battles that have recently occurred. They are, I am afraid, irretrievably lost to the inquiring mind. So, from this point on, I shall attempt to construct a thoughtful history and system of ethics that may be used to judge and define all future behaviour.

If you are in possession of any such articles (scientific, political, historical, or philosophical) that may be used to replenish the many great works by greater thinkers that were lost in battle to barbarian hands, then feel free to write me.

Thank you,

Celitinus@hotmail.com


One for all, and all for someone whose name eludes me at the moment, but I'm sure he/she/it has to be a worthy one...


My-Oh-My... This was a boring week... Ok, we had the usual whining about free trade and stuff like that, we had the usual talk by the Lords and the Muskateers, but over all I'm a bit disappointed. Oh, one thing: Seems I was a bit premature in my statement that people now understand the mercenary concept. They obviously don't. So, that was your usual small bird report, Your's Truly, Sparrow

P.S.: What the f*ck do you mean, wrong Sparrow me arse!


Q: "The question is, when your breed a peasant and a horse to get a Centaur, which one is male, the horse or the peasant?"

A: Yes. (You're welcome.)


Rumor has it the Inner circle of the Musketeers is fed up with Lord Maltars lack of leadership and are hunting down all his nobels as we speak. I hear they plan to offer the heads on pikes as a peace treaty with the mighty Lords of the Crown.


Oh, for a still. I could make my own scotch.


Oh boy, sailing has taken on a new meaning.


They knelt by the mountainside campfire against the cold. The sunset cast long shadows on the horizon. Is that him? As darkness fell upon them they spoke of him that was. Stories of his deeds and fears of his comming were told. As the wolf howled at the rising moon the duke wet himself. Is that him? Who asked the owl? The swordmen deserted. The priest hid from the fog of death in the temple. Madness came among the circle of friends. All became suspect. Too late, he was already there. From hell's heart he shall spit his last breath at thee. So let it be written. When next tales are told, who shall be the Top dog?


The answer is: You can choose ,but I think it would be wise to use a male peasant and a female horse For a horse has more place in her belly than a human. The real question is :why aren't they equiped with bow's and ranged abilities


Pig Foul will make a nice roast !!!


Long ago there lived a pirate seafarer named Captain Mordekai. He was a courageous man who showed no fear in facing his enemies (at least when they were empty ships and newbies). One day, while sailing the Camaris Straits, a look-out spotted a newbie ship, and the crew became frantic. Captain Mordekai bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt." The First Mate quickly retrieved the captain's red shirt, and, after donning the shirt, the captain led his crew of pirates into battle and defeated the poor newbies. Later on, the look-out spotted not one, but two newbie ships. The captain again howled for his red shirt and once again vanquished the newbies, what with their small crews and poor attack values. That evening, all the men sat around on the deck recounting the day's triumphs, and one of them asked the pirate captain: "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before each battle?" The captain replied: "If I am wounded in the attack, my crew won't notice my bleeding and will continue to fight, unafraid." All of the men sat in silence and marveled at the courage of their captain. As dawn came the next morning, the look-out spotted not one newbie ship, not two, but TEN LOTC ships approaching. The rank and file all stared at the captain and waited for his usual request. Captain Mordekai calmly shouted: "Bring me my brown pants!


If People knew who we really were they would not be in such a hurry to start a war!


Hi my name is Larry, and this is my borther Daryl, and this is my other brother Daryl.


Oh, for a still. I could make my own Scotch.


Oh, for a rope. I could hang you from the nearest tree.


Oh, for a big stick. I could beat you to a pulp.


Oh, for the love of god. Shut UP!


Oh, for a...

(sudden noise from behind)

hey, you are not allowed in here...

Ahhh..

(thump)

stop!!!

(thud)

shiii....


Oh, the wanna-be-scotch maker no longer exists on this world.


(ghostly voice from beyond the grave)

Oh, for a priest. I could be ressurected again....


With PLATO, Rimmon & BORG ready to destroy the LOTC attack on camaris...Who will be their next target?

Will the eagles wings be clipped? Super Alliances of the world beware... You may be next.


I just lost 200 ea because someone "forgot" to teleport me the gold.

Thanks guys!


Blast! Blast! Blast!

Too many lovely targets but not enough time to play with them all!

Well I guess I will go for the short fat one...

yeah that one, with all the gold.

Now where did I put that potion.


This is an official anouncement from the LOTC (The Lard on the Cooker)

People, when preparing for defending your castle don't overlook and obvious resource that all modern castles have.

With all the cooking for the troops in your castle the level of lard and fat that builds up is amazing! With some basic skills you Alchemist can convert this oil and greese into a highly flamable substance which can be poured from the towers of your castle.

This burning oil will disfigure and painfully destroy the oncoming hordes of enemies... (throw in some sliced potatoes and fish for added effect!)

This advanced tactic for defence will be known as "Maltars Folly", in honour of the creator(who believed that this oil would save his precious castles)

How many do you have left now?

Lord Lardass.


Given what we know about the things you can crossbreed with peasants, shouldn't crossbreeding be under the Persuasion skills?


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