+----------------------------------------------------------------------+ | The Olympia Times issue g2-96 | | December 15, 1998 | | | | turn 96 359 players http://www.pbm.com/ | +----------------------------------------------------------------------+
Questions, comments, to play: firstname.lastname@example.org
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Greetings Olympians and Fellow Drassans, We in TIB have much news to report.
First, we are happy to report that we have had much success in our war with Lord Bane and consider the active portion of our conflict at a close. TIB forces have destroyed both known castles belonging to Lord Bane and hold more than 3/4's of his nobles prisoner in our dungeons. We no longer consider The Efficient Empire to be a threat to TIB holdings. Please be advised that there are still several Bane nobles at large and TIB forces will continue to be on the look out for these men. Should the opportunity present itself, we will attempt to capture these remaining nobles.
For those of you wishing to profit from Bane's misfortune, please be advised that at least 2 castles that we know of are currently garrisoning former Bane lands. It is our belief that most of his lands will be claimed by others shortly. If you are attempting to garrison some of this land, please double check who the garrison in question belongs to before you destroy it. We would hate for another war to spring up in the region.
Secondly, TIB would like to announce modifications to it's resource harvesting and city market Rules of Conduct. In an effort to conserve space they will not be detailed here, but it is strongly recommended that any faction operating around Drassa, or anywhere within TIB territory, visit our web site at: http://members.aol.com/theicyblak click on the charter link and read the section "Rules of Conduct". Specifically rules 5-8.
These changes take effect immediately. If any player or faction has any question about these changes, please fell free to contact us.
That's all for now from TIB Alliance
-- Lords of Hammerhill [gz2]
"Ask your PGA tour Pro!" A letter from a while back has risen to the top of the mailbag. From someone in the Yellowleaf area, reporting themselves as the shunned Platoan, the Times '89:
"I recently went to a local club in the Yellowleaf area, and was barred from playing on their course. I was told it was because of the cleats I had, but I think it was due to my affiliation with PLATO. I offered to buy a pair of regulation shoes, but they told me the club store was closed due to some obscure holiday or something. I thought this kind of small-minded discrimination was a thing of the past. We PLATO members have gone a long way to better our image among the community. The rest of society has left the past and their ignorant ancestors behind - why hasn't the golf community?"
A cracking good question! Most of the PGA membership is made up of PLATO ("People Liking And Tending to Overswing") and they've had to go through a long process to gain acceptance at clubs throughout the land. Before we get too far into this, let me just ask a little background question of you, sparked by something you just slipped in there: you were wearing "cleats"? Have you actually played golf before? We call them "spikes," or, as you do later in your note, "shoes." I don't know why your 'cleats' would be a particular problem, if they were in fact golf shoes, unless perhaps the soles of the shoes were caked with the blood of innocents and hair and skull fragments from allies you had betrayed. That happens; always remember to clean your spikes before entering a clubhouse! (Now, some people may think that perhaps this poor PLATO member brought spiked shoes to a course that only allows 'spikeless' shoes, and they may want my opinion on the issue of spiked versus spikeless. Now, I respect the good intentions of those who think spikeless shoes are better for the greens, but they are sadly misguided. Whenever I and my ceramic spikes are turned away from a course I always give the head pro a sad, commiserating little nod and go out into the parking lot, get into my humvee, and go do donuts on the putting greens of the tenth and eighteenth holes. Anyway, the question was about discrimination against PLATO members at the finer courses. I remember discussing discrimination in golf with Charlie Sifford. I asked him if he'd ever been the victim of discrimination in golf. He said he had, any actually it was quite surprising how many times people told stories about him that just weren't true! How sad. Anyway, for any PLATO members that have had a bad time trying to get on the course at such places as Royal Yellowleaf, TPC at Provinia, or the Links at Port Aurnos, all I can say is keep a stiff upper lip, keep trying, be polite, and maintain a veiled air of menace at all times and before you know it you'll be dormie on the back side!
Remember, your PGA pro doesn't just make your golf game better, they make golf a better game!
-- The PGA [mh8]
Two if by land one if by sea Troops will arrive delivered by me
"Dead Poets Society"
-- Captain BlowHard [w000]
We've taken a vote. We don't know who. We don't know why We do know where. Maddog's the guy He rebels against a user. Mordekai the loser. Strike up the band. We will lend a hand.
-- Nimmo [z911]
My life has a superb cast, but I can't figure out the plot.
-- Tiger IIth [s634]
Greetings Olympians from the Syr-Antin.
We have now fully established our domain and are presently consolidating after the victory over our aggresive foes. I have noticed over the last few turns, nobles and armies moving into the area and I once again urge anyone in the vicinity of columns 37-42 rows BS-BX to contact my minister of foriegn affairs as to the nature of your travels. I also strongly advise against it in the next few turns as enemy nobles have been seen and hostile orders for all my nobles and garrisons are extensive, and I would not wish to attack anyone accidently as they probaly have the same peaceful intents as I. To this end, send couriers to Pozzie@hotmail.com with any requests on boundaries and local alliances working in the area. We are a peaceful neighborhood but will defend ourselves against any unlawful incursions. Happy travelling to all.
-- Lee The Brave 
Support the Dog Go west attack a garrison CRY FREEDOM
-- Captain BiteMe [p675]
* Pegasus Aviary-Stables *
Business is Brisk!
Several satisfied customers in Land's End Southmarche. At only 300 gold a head our winged steeds are flying out the door! Affordable luxury animals for even the newest members of the noble class. You don't have to be the only noble in your province walking anymore!
-- Evanshen [w388]
In need of more troops or a second flank? How about an armed escort through hostile wilderness or dangerous waters? Then contact "The Brotherhood of the Red God" (The BoRG), and for a modest fee we can send an escort by caravan on land or via ship in dangerous waters. In general we are swords for hire and for the right price, will attack almost any target. Please visit our web site at www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/1843/borg.html or contact us at email@example.com
May the Red God smile upon you.
-- Heimdall [d522]
Woof Woof Woof Support the dog
-- Venus De Filedo [a287]
I had a speech prepared but I tire from the bull . May the red god of the b o r g E. S. A. D. Need more fertilizer on a second flank? How much will you charge ME to send more troops after ME? Your army and friends made excellent manure for my flowers. If that punk mordekai won't come back to here...I'll just have to go there, west that is. I'll kill anyone he puts between us.
16 dead and counting I'm using my toes now. The pile rises.
Chief Head counter and spokesperson for Maddog Roy Earl
-- Princess Keleigh [p849]
There are twelve landmasses large enough to be classified as regions (not counting the Underworld, the Cloudlands, Faery, or Hades). They are, in rough order of size:
Provinia Camaris Krussos Atala Ormos Tollus Ferenth Atnos Ossicus Cipheria Cragstan Camaris Island
-- Encyclopedia Olympia
Next: The political world of Olympia.
Submissions or suggestions may be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org. Do not expect a reply, as the editors wish to remain anonymous.
The maddog is gonna get it...
Soon Olympia will run red with the blood of traitors.
The Vulture Speaks:
Have you missed me? I've been gorging myself like, well, a vulture on all the fresh corpses that are piling up all over the world. Boy, it sure was a good idea getting out of G1 and flying over here--in that world after the AOO took over the only fresh kills tended to be overcooked by the fire of thousands of dragons. Much beter here, yum yum...
So once the Codricker war machine has conquered PLATO, which if you believe the rumors is going to happen pretty quickly, one has to wonder what they will do with all that ironmongery they are going to have just siting about on Camaris. Will they sail it all the way back to Provina, or will they use it to take the rest of Camaris. Should the Crimson Dragon look to his defenses? After all, the LotC have shown to have little regard for things like trust and treaties, so one doubts if it matter to them that Eridianus has shipped them arms in their hour of need.
Of course, the rumors about PLATO may be an exaggeration. For all the bragging in the times, I can't believe that the entrance of the Couchketeers into the conflict hasn't forced Sir Codric to turn his attention to the north. Two front wars are always tough, no matter who you are.
Hey, who is this Maddog creature? Is he really just a single faction dedicated simply to murder and mayhem? If he is, more power to him from a carrion eater's perspective. Words won't stop him, only force will bring him to the leash. So far he has only attacked the weak, halt, and lame, like our emasculated former hero Jheremai the Scarlet. If he is truly mad, or truly what he says he is, he'll attack an LotC target next. If he doesn't then he is most likely a front for them. Big alliances tend to do that fairly often--anyone besides this old bird remember the Swishbuckler, aka the Sherrif of Pelenth in drag?
A few other puny little conflicts are keeping my relations well fed elsewhere besides Yellowleaf. The Peacehawk and his awesome TIBS minions have flexed their muscles to slap down one entire faction, the dear departed Lord Bane. What Power, what Majesty, what a Frightful Bore. Why don't those guys find themselves a real war, like joining the anti-Codric crusade on one side or the other.
And then this much publicized conflict about yew in some godforsaken out of the way stinkhole that all of us have been subjected to: omigollygosh, one noble was killed! One noble! Codric kills dozens before breakfast and these clowns think we care about the death of one noble? Hundreds of excited vultures flew on over to find a free meal, and all they found was one dead guy--only two eyeballs for all those hungry birds. I tell you, it was almost a riot.
Well, all this ranting has made me hungry, and anyway the wife is whining for some takeout chinese. Guess I'll drop over and see how my old buddy Ming is doing.
May your flesh keep from rotting until I can eat it:
For Oleg, the skies will always be filled with stars.
A British tar is a soaring soul, As free as a mountain bird, His energetic fist should be ready to resist A dictatorial word.
His nose should pant and his lip should curl, His cheeks should flame and his brow should furl, His bosom should heave and his heart should glow, And his fist be ever ready for a knock-down blow.
His eyes should flash with an inborn fire, His brow with scorn be wrung; He never should bow down to a domineering frown, Or the tang of a tyrant tongue.
His foot should stamp, and his throat should growl, His hair should twirl, and his face should scowl; His eyes should flash, and his breast protrude, And this should be his customary attitude.
I like it a Warrior with style, finally. Moving south to support the Dog -the Highlander
You can recognize a coward by his posting of a threat. The lowly coward will rumor his intentions. Like I always do. I am a Punk. I lurk in the shadows using threats as a weapon. I am and have always been a FOOL. I shall now retire to private life and move to the pasture to live with my new wife, the family mule.
- the Lowlander
Don't look now or you will see an army of friends Headed south to walk the dog. Woof woof "Friends of the dog"