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   | The Olympia Times                                        issue g1-81 |
   | January 10, 1996                                                     |
   |                                                                      |
   | turn 81  150 players                   http://www.pbm.com/oly/times/ |

Questions, comments, to play: info@pbm.com

Olympia PBEM

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Important Notice ----------------

Your moderator has moved to the San Francisco Bay Area. Please send all postal correspondence to Shadow Island's new address. If you have recently sent mail to the old address, don't worry, it will be collected and forwarded. However, please be tolerant of any delays the forwarding may incur.

Our new address is:

Shadow Island Games P.O. Box 390983 Mountain View, CA 94039-0983

Electronic contact information (domain name, email address, web URL's, etc.) will not change.

Our phone and fax numbers will change at some point in the future. You may continue to use the existing numbers for now.

* * *

Player-contributed press

So, where do I get my first dragon? Do I have to find one and capture it, or is there an easier way.

-- The day of Rest [ju3]

---------------------- S. CAMARIS Update ----------------------

Monthly notice: any new visitors to our fair isle should notify us in advance.

-- The Crazy Quilters [vn7]

Customer Testamonial on behalf of the First Bank of Provinia

Greetings, Provinians! My name's Bob the Jolly Fat Guy. Why am I so jolly? Well I'll tell you. One year ago I deposited 1000 gold into the First Bank of Provinia. And boy am I glad I did. This month the account closed with a total balance of 2239 gold! How's that for capital gains, eh?

So take it from me, Bob of l'Ordre de St. Christophe, First Bank of Provinia delivers.

-- The Right Reverend Bob [v1c]

To the Lords of Krussos.. Nobles of my faction would like to make landfall on Krussos in Carse [cr23]. We come in peace and for the purpose of meeting with Penelope [t1t]. We ask that you contact us via this noble so that no misunderstanding might occur leading to unwanted conflict. Thank you. x7t@g1.pbm.com

-- Elaine [x7t]

***Torba Bacor Warning***

Torba Bacor is claimed, occupied, etc...

Standard rules and requests (blah, blah, blah).

Usual threats of recourse to brutal force and so forth (yadda, yadda, yadda).

Contact me to avoid untoward incidents. Anyone wishing to make NP donations, however, is free to ignore this.

-- Bishop Hugh Latimer [l4b]

___ ___ ___ / / ) / ) /___ /___/ /___/ / . _ _ /_ / )_ __ / / _ _ . __ . _ / / / _> / /___/(_>/ //< of / / (_)|// / // (_>

The First Bank of Provinia has offices in some of the major cities on the continent of Provinia. The FBoP offers the following facilities.

o Special offers for New Olympia Players. o Excellent Interest Rates on Bank Accounts. o A Fast and Efficient Courier Service. o Money Transfers. o Short and Long Term Loans. o Insurance Policies. o Pawn Broking Service.

Call in at your local branch for further details.

-- First Bank of Provinia [v0z]

The rocky isle of Noren is claimed. Persons wishing to visit (by any means) should contact me first. Failure to do so may result in brutal acts of whimsy and greed.

-- Richard Rumbold [m1e]



"I _still_ say the Sherrif's also a Pirate...."

And _we_ still say we dislike subliterate weenies who can't spell S-H-E-R-I-F-F correctly. (Besides, who asked you, bud?!)

"Answer guy. please answer this. I'm a new player to this world and have only been playing for a few turns. the Liberty confed- eration has contacted me and offered me a castle in Ossicus, where ever that is? but no instructions on how to get there. how do I get there?"

From the IC, walk east until you drown, then keep walking. (Or else you get your butt on an eastbound ship, capisce??? Get a map!)

"Is there anyone interested in selling a roundship?"

Not us, pal. Sorry. Try "BeelzeBob's Discount Seabiscuits".

You're welcome.

--- Jack and Wally, Irascible Coots 1st Class

Bigger losers need bigger messages.

From the diaries of Keldar, Commander, 1st Air Corps:

The orders finally came down last night. The months of waiting are over and the attack is on. Of course, my boys were all on leave at the time. If we push our hardest, we should just barely be able to assemble the corps and arrive in time for the initial push.

Les sanglots longs de l automne Blessent mon coeur d une langueur monotone

Sure, I'll grant that the Mystics are run intelligently, but are you really LC?

I don't have anything interesting to say this time.

It is said that the treacherous are ever distrustful.

-The Wise

Pish pish: the Liberty Confederacy is a fine noble group with a goodly cause. Only the ignorant speak ill of this just band of nobles.

Someone Asked: > What the heck does an Enchanted Staff do?

I'm not sure, but I'd guess it is a weapon, and will improve your attack, and maybe your defense. Just guess, tho.

Someone Else Asked: > Who is this guy who keeps posting bad French poetry in > the TIMES?

Someone desperately in need of 25 gold, methinks.

The Same Someone then Asked: > And _how_ can he be stopped?!?!

Kill off a faction every turn until the bad french poetry ceases.

Someone who is 'slightly worried' Asked (paraphrased): >

Ossicus is off to the east, a couple of months sailing from Provinia. Didn't you get a map when you started?

As for how to get there, I don't recommend swimming. Build a boat, it'll only take you a month or two.

As for how trustworthy Norc and the LC are, see my message in the times from turn 78.

--The Answer Guy

Hurray for "jmmbjwgcmmbrsmtabsrmhmrnrj" :)

Er der nogen fra skandinavien med i dette spil.......

Another week of research.

Coastal reef? How the heck does on of these show up in the middle of open ocean?!

This money needed to fund world domination efforts!

Democracy is coming...to Provinia!

It's true! The Swishbuckler is gone forever. Any imitations would be only pale copies. Ahhhh, the memories of his talented lips will be cherished! Alas, I have seen his grave and his brainless corpse. He is deeply covered by earth and lovely pink tulips.

I'm glad you liked the flowers. I'll be happy to arrange a bulk delivery, if you'll just post your address.

I might bring his special pirate hat [dk5w] to IC for auction, would anyone like a souvenir?

Does it still have the propeller on top?

"To the answer guy. Can you tell us if the AOO has dropped, they seem to have been quiet of late?"

> Q. What the heck does an Enchanted Staff do?

A. Much better work than a Disenchanted Staff.

A spotty, undersexed git wants to know:

"Who is this guy who keeps posting bad French poetry in the TIMES? And _how_ can he be stopped?!?!"

If you look in the player list, there is only one e-mail address from France. If she's the one posting the French proverbs, maybe she'll stop if you ask her nicely. Personally, I like trying to figure out what the expressions mean and hope whomever is posting them continues to do so.

We're sailing, sailing, sailing far away... We're bound for new lands, over the Far Horizons!

How safe is it in Gentlewind?

In the far north a mighty army is gathering

If Poe wrote the Alka-Seltzer theme:

At the banquet, I, unswerving swollowed serving after serving, Though the food was underserving, and unnerving were my hosts; Now I wrestle with the question of impending indigestion And my stomach burbles blindly with the groans of gastric ghosts.

Dare I seek the only hope that reaches deep as my despair? Still, my vicious predilection to a chemical addiction Is as trivial as fiction with this torture to compare. And my soul sighs for the solace that indubitably is-

In the plop, plop, plop, plop plop, plop, plop And the fizz, fizz, fizz, fizz fizz. (David Smith, Greenbelt)

> So, is it safe to sail out of the IC now, or what?

It depends on whether you're in a stolen ship or not.

Clan With No Name, your time has come.