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From: olympia@pbm.com (Olympia PBEM)
Subject: Olympia Times g1-71
To: totimes@pbm.com

+----------------------------------------------------------------------+ | The Olympia Times issue g1-71 | | November 1, 1995 | | | | turn 71 157 players http://www.pbm.com/oly/times/ | +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

Questions, comments, to play: info@pbm.com

Olympia PBEM

* * *

Player-contributed press

Welcome to Gildeath - The Gateway to the North West.

The City of Gildeath and it's surrounding lands on the Isle of Antresk, are the lawful demesne of the Draconian Elite and their allies. Travellers are welcome, but please inform me when you wish to traverse my lands.

-- Draconian Elite [fg4]

TOURNAMENT In my recent wanderings I have encountered quite a number of large stacks of armies looking for something to happen. It occurs to me that a tournament might be a good way for these stacks of armies to show their power. I open the floor for discussion on how to stage a tournament. I think the times would be a good place to share ideas.

-- The day of Rest [ju3]

We're looking for a few good nobles...

The Liberty Confederacy is accepting applications for new members! Confederates gain the invaluable benefits of collective action in return for same. The Liberty Confederacy is a loose defencive alliance of nobles who wish to pursue their happiness with their freedoms intact. We are not engaged in any debilitating wars! Newbies especially welcome.

So come to Ossicus & make your fortune with the LC!

(applications to this id#).

PS: Extra bonus! If you can manage to haul your carcass over to Ossicus we'llgive you a free castle! No, this is not a joke.

-- Circle of Hope [lp3]

---------------------- S. CAMARIS Update ----------------------

Monthly notice: any new visitors to our fair isle should notify us in advance.

-- The Crazy Quilters [vn7]

Customer Testamonial on behalf of the First Bank of Provinia

Greetings, Provinians! My name's Jech Ercheflo the Friendly Thin Guy. I'm a Trader. I travel Provinia buying and selling and trading everything from the highest grade avinia leaf to the cheap woven baskets that I buy off of broke lowlifes in Imperial City. Now as you might imagine, with half-breeds like Swishbuckler runnin' 'round, Provinia is not always as friendly and peaceful as me. So I don't like carryin' large amounts of cash on a trade run, if ya know what I mean. That's why I bank at First Provinia. Think about it: low-interest loans, high interest rates, newbie bonuses, warehouse facilities, shipping services...

So take it from me, Jech Ercheflo the Friendly Thin Guy, don't wind up lying in the gutters of Imperial City weaving baskets for a livin'. Give the the First Bank of Provinia a call. You'll be glad you did.

-- Jech Ercheflo the Friendly Thin Guy [h3f]

Hmmmm, I might be mistaken. But I can't be bothered to look it up. ;-) But who's to say the Cohorts don't have a "Rory" theme to their alliance?

-- Amra [g1p]

Greetings Fellow Olympiads!

The Liberty Confederacy rules West Ossicus. Peaceful, law-abiding travelers are welcome. Bandits, pirates, & their associates are advised to avoid the area for their own protection. Investors of any kind (merchants, inn-keepers, temple-builders, tower owners, miners, etc.) are especially welcome to civilize this untamed land. Travelers wishing to exploit the resources of these lands should contact us so we don't have harvesting conflicts. Unapproved harvesting is frowned upon.

PS: I don't use the rumor section. Ever. Accept no imitations (unless they're witty), listen to only the _real_ General Norc, z1a.

-- General Norc [z1a]

___ ___ ___ / / ) / ) /___ /___/ /___/ / . _ _ /_ / )_ __ / / _ _ . __ . _ / / / _> / /___/(_>/ //< of / / (_)|// / // (_>

The First Bank of Provinia has offices in some of the major cities on the continent of Provinia. The FBoP offers the following facilities.

o Special offers for New Olympia Players. o Excellent Interest Rates on Bank Accounts. o A Fast and Efficient Courier Service. o Money Transfers. o Short and Long Term Loans. o Insurance Policies. o Pawn Broking Service.

Call in at your local branch for further details.

The customers of the FBoP are recommending the services of the Bank. If you want to find out just how good we are, talk to them. Our customers can say more about just how good we are than we can!

-- First Bank of Provinia [v0z]

Arrh har har!

Listen up you mangy, cowering, Olympia Times whining, dirt-sucking peasants. I'm Swishbuckler, the baddest noble to sail the Atnos Channel. I've got a trouser snake longer than a cutlass, balls to fill a #2 washtub and enough hair on my butt to weave an oriental rug. I've killed dragons with nothing but spit and hard work, raped greater demons and dared the Faery Hunt to hunt this fairy. I chew hot pitch to keep my breath sweet and take Orc Oil enemas to stay regular. I've been booted from Hades for bad behavior, banned in the Imperial City and if I tattooed the names of all the nobles I've killed on your arm it would run halfway down your back. When the Sheriff of Pelenth captured me I bit off my finger, savored the good eating, then picked the lock on my cell with the bones. I bent Miyuki over a couch before Kovaq'nu learned to spell, wiped a booger on BtA's auraculum and made Atnerks wear a dress. I've been dead three times but the Devil is afraid to take me. There is no one that compares to me.

If it floats on water I'll run it down, burn it up, and scatter the ashes on the waves. If it walks by the ocean I'll land on it, decimate it, and pile the bones on the shore. If it flies through the sky I'll pull it down, pluck it clean and make lamps from the skins. I'll tie your nobles to the mainmast, practice my swordplay and hunt sharks with the remains. I'll hunt you down and destroy your faction, and I'll do it just for fun.

-- Swishbuckler [w0p]


When is Olympia game 2 going to start?

Armada? What armada? Oh, THAT armada!

(from last turn's TIMES): "OK then, how much mithril am I offered from an old book that that allows a noble to learn Necromancy?"

Oh? Impressed by our find, are we? How much are _you_ willing to pay ME to take it off your hands, Orc-oil breath?

P.S. You don't get mithril FROM a book, Jack.

- B. Dalton Waldenmage

To mete the winds, slay longer.

Qui va a la chasse perd sa place

I know that your powers of retention, Are as wet as a warthog's backside. But thick as you are, pay attention. My words are a matter of pride. It's clear from your vacant expression, The lights are not all on upstairs. But we're talking kings and successions, Even you can't be caught unawares.

But be prepared for the chance of a lifetime. Be prepared for sensational news. A shining new era, is tiptoeing nearer. And where do we feature? Just listen to teacher. I know it sounds sordid, but you'll be rewarded When at last I am given my dues, And injustice deliciously squared. Be prepared!

It's great that we'll soon be protected, With the king that we all time adore. Of course, quid pro quo, you're expected, To take certain duties on board. The future is littered with prizes And 'though I may have received, The point that I must emphasise is You won't get sniff without me!

So be prepared for the coup of the century, Be prepared for the murkyist scam. Meticulous planning, ternacity spanning. The case of denial, is simply why I'll, Be king undisputed, respected, saluted, And seen for the wonder I am. Yes my teeth and ambitions are bared, Be prepared!

-- The Lying King.

Don't be one of those factions which only works toward the advancement of others. Find a way to really build your might.

Need 25 gold for research into the latest super-duper killer spell: AuraBlast 95! (Brought to you by the fine people at Microsoft)

Someone asked: > Why is it that the Great BtA sent in his latest treatise to the > _Times_ as a rumor and not as press?

An excellent question, one I've been wondering about for some time. Everyone should know that he's [x9i], just from reading past issues of the _Times_. What's he got to hide by posting rumors instead of signed articles? Gee, maybe that's not him at all...

Someone else asked: > OK then, how much mithril am I offered from an old book that > that allows a noble to learn Necromancy?

Well, let's see... I've got two copper pieces, an old gum wrapper, and a frog. Is that enough? (By the way, I like the way you double your words at the end and beginning of lines)

And Someone else said: >Do castles ever get damaged/need maintenance like ships do?

Yes, castles can, and do, get damaged in battles, particularly if catapults and/or battering rams are used against them. (Look Ma! a straight answer!)

And Someone ELSE asked: >What is an auraculum?

An Auraculum is an object that a mage uses to store and magnify his power. A certain amount of power is invested in it when it is created, and it gives it's owner the capacity for double the investment. It makes him more powerful, but also makes him vulnerable, for should he lose it, he loses all that went into it. Should it ever be destroyed, it's creator dies.

For an example from literature, think of Tolkien's One Ring.

(wow, another striaght answer)

-- The Answer Guy

Another day, another 50 gold.

How do you get away with saying Another 25 gold... ?

Wait! What is that I see? Looks like a shocking pink ship with really tacky lace sails. Could this be the dreaded Swishbuckler? Prepare to fire at the pansy!

> Anyone willing to share more rankings?

Would you accept more made-up ones?

Money makes the world go round!

"Dead nobles tell no tails"

The gully had been cut through the earth of the plains by the early year rains, but it now stood dry as the bleached bones of a small herdbeast that lay against one of the earthen sides. The dark wizard stirred the bones with the tip of his sword, as if trying to divine the future from the patterns he saw there. Then his attention returned to the orc.

The orc knelt in the center of the gully, studying the ground. In sharp contrast to its overall appearance, it was armored in well-kept leather, and an emblem had been mounted at its shoulder, the black symbol of a dog's head on a red field. A club set with a number of wicked iron spikes lay on the ground within easy reach.

The orc carefully examined the ground in front of him. A large number of tracks covered most of the floor of the gully, claw and paw prints overlying each other, with an occasional, rare boot print. But at the point where he knelt, the tracks ended abruptly. The warlock watched as the orc dug his fingers into the ground and broke up several clots of earth carefully. Then he looked at the warlock.

"They din' hide. No track. No smell. Just gone," it told him, shaping each word with obvious effort.

The warlock nodded. "That's what I expected. He beat us here, and fled into the Land of Silver Shadows." He uncovered a small, worn stone about half the size of his palm that he had been holding. He gestured over the stone, and it changed. Dozens of runes appeared, carved in the surface of the stone. Small silver flames ran along the runes, spelling out words to anyone knowledgable enough to look. Then the stone reverted to its former, undistinguished appearance. "We'll make camp here for tonight. In the morning, we'll follow."

RUMOR has it that Swishbuckler and crew may be headed for the protection of the pirates infesting the Mysa area.

> Put up protection from a scry. Does this help against receive visions from priests?

Another month without any discovery! When will I discover a new spell?

" well this gold keeps my ship afloat, and alittle profit on the side"

Let us reform Swishbuckler of his antisocial habits.

What good are crystals? Does anyone know where I can sell them?

Why is it that whenever I want to trade, I'm on Tollus and my customer is at the IC?

Lots for Sale

Art Dekko and sons - fine art dealer to Olympia is proud to offer a number of the finest saline statuary by the excepitional artist Salzmen.

"WANTED: Information concerning Ossicus and/or the Liberty Confederation."

It's east of Provinia. The Liberty Confederation holds some of it.

Anything more will cost you.

Do castles ever get damaged/need maintenance like ships do?

No, they seldom hit reefs.

What's an araculum?

_____________________________ ( I intended an Ode ) ___ O o ( and it turned to a Sonnet ) {~._.~} o O ( It began a la mode, ) ( Y ) ( I intended an Ode; ) ()~*~() ( But Rose crossed the road ) (_)-(_) ( in her latest new Bonnet; ) -Henry Austin ( I intended an Ode ) Dobson ( and it turned to a Sonnet. ) -----------------------------

Another 25 gold...

The AAO will kill any noble that sets foot outside of a safe Haven in Profina.

**************** Warning, Death approaching *****************

Any structure in AOO held territory is unsafe. If you are in any of these structures you will be considered a friend of the AOO. We will kill you indiscriminately. -Guerrillas of the Mist (Got'M)


> Why is it that the Great BtA sent in his latest treatise to the > _Times_ as a rumor and not as press?

Deniability -- an issue close to the heart of all the Great and Powerful. I believe in the past seventy turns there has only been one single press statement verifiably by BtA.