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   | The Olympia Times                                        issue g1-57 |
   | July 26, 1995                                                        |
   |                                                                      |
   | turn 57  183 players                                                 |

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Olympia PBEM

* * *

Player-contributed press


Visitors to DRUCARTAN are asked to procure a visa before entering the area. Drucartan is a very peacefull continent, where AOO and non AOO factions live in peace and harmony. No noble has ever been attacked in Drucartan by another noble.

If you want a visa, please send a message to John Sen[m6f], describing the nobles in the party, the size of the party, and the reason for visiting Drucartan. There is no fee, and requests will only be refused in rare ( i.e. I am bringing 2000 men (or dragons) to kill all nobles ) circumstances.

-- The Sen Clan [di4]

Greetings Fellow Olympiads!

The Liberty Confederacy rules part of Northwest Ossicus. Peaceful, law-abiding travelers are welcome. Bandits, pirates, & their associates are advised to avoid the area for their own protection. Investors of any kind (merchants, inn-keepers, temple-builders, tower owners, miners, etc.) are especially welcome to civilize this untamed land. Travelers wishing to exploit the resources of these lands should contact us so we don't have harvesting conflicts. Unapproved harvesting is frowned upon.

-- Circle of Hope [lp3]


Now up for auction in the IC: one scroll of Weathermagic! Write the Illustrated Man and say how much you would like to bid. We will change the selling price to match the highest bidder!

Maps are available! Get yours today from the Illustrated Man [s5e] in the Imperial City! If you're a new player, only 75 gold plus your surface mail address for all the info known about Provinia and the world! For experienced players, ask about a blow-up of your area! All current orders have been mailed.

-- The Midnight Carnival [nx2]

---------------------- S. CAMARIS Update ----------------------

Monthly notice: any new visitors to our fair isle should notify us in advance.

-- The Crazy Quilters [vn7]

__ __ / /\______________________________________________________________/ /\ \_\/ \_\/ | GateMastery, the final frontier? | |<--------------------------------------------------------------->| | | | The Gatemasters are here to help *You*. | | | | Here is how it works. We have already located fifteen gateways| | and are rapidly pinning down many more. We want to help | | you help us. Send us in your gate readings and we will send | | you back other information we have that will help you to | | pin point the gateway. If you can pinpoint a gateway that | | we have not, then you get to become a full Gatemaster will | | access to all the gate information we have. | | | | Why do we do it this way? Well there is a large effort that | | must be made in locating gates, and we don't think it's fair | | that people free-load. So long as you are actively trying | | to locate new gateways, you will continue to get help. | | essentially people get out what they put it. We work this | | way to encourage people to contribute. | _| _| / /\______________________________________________________________/ /\ \_\/ \_\/

-- Cloud King [q0k]


Visitors are welcome to the area controlled by the Cohorts of Colossus [vo4], as long as they obtain travel permits first. Not all requests will be granted. The affected area includes the land provinces bx25-bx27, by24-by27, and bz27.

To avoid possible misunderstandings, do not enter this area without a permit, nor collect resources without express permission. Violators of this policy may be subject to arrest.

I only rarely refuse reasonable requests, and then only because I've already granted my quota.

This policy helps ensure the security of all nobles within these lands. If you are interested in a franchise on collecting resources in one of these provinces, please contact me. I have friendly arrangements with several factions along these lines.

-- Sheriff Pelenth of Gentlewind [f3i]

The Olympia Atlas is accepting contributions, and is available for download! Be the first to contribute information for unexplored lands (Faery).

In the tradition of Oleg's Map (tm), the Atlas is a compilation of geographical information useful for explorers, traders, and adventurers. Best of all, it's absolutely free!

To contribute to the Atlas, simply send turn excerpts (cut out all the incriminating parts) that contain the following information:

o) Mapping data (region & route info) o) City market reports o) City skills lists o) Inner locations

and send it to sx6@g1.pbm.com. We'll include it into the next version of the Atlas.

The Atlas is available by ftp from your nearest PBM ftp site (ftp.erg.sri.com in the USA, check the PBM FAQ for other sites), in the directory /pub/pbm/olympia, as atlas.X, where X is the turn of the last update.

The Atlas is also available on the PBMGames forum on CompuServe, in the fantasy games section, as atlas.oly.

Brought to you by the Skulking Vermin (sx6)

Note!! Due to Real-Life (tm) commitments, the Atlas will be appearing irregularly, as I have time to assemble contributions.

-- Sludge [x0o]

This is monthly notice if you wish to visit the environs of Cycarth and Redwine please be courteous enough to let m9l know (you can reach him at heyman@camis.stanford.edu. I do not currently plan to restrict access, but would like to know who is wandering around in my front yard. I would especially like to know if you plan on using any of the natural rsources (peasants, wood, and the like) in the provinces bt25 bt26 bt27 bu25 bu26 bu27 bv25 bv26 bv27 bw25 bw26 and bw27.

-- Darkman [m9l]

___ ___ ___ / / ) / ) /___ /___/ /___/ / . _ _ /_ / )_ __ / / _ _ . __ . _ / / / _> / /___/(_>/ //< of / / (_)|// / // (_>

The First Bank of Provinia has offices in some of the major cities on the continent of Provinia. The FBoP offers the following facilities.

o Special offers for New Olympia Players. o Excellent Interest Rates on Bank Accounts. o A Fast and Efficient Courier Service. o Money Transfers. o Short and Long Term Loans. o Insurance Policies. o Pawn Broking Service.

Call in at your local branch for further details.

-- First Bank of Provinia [v0z]


The Brotherhood of Ormos claims the city of Avalon [ao0k] and all lands and resources inside the boundary of [bp05]-[bp08]-[br06] -[br09] inclusive, as its sole and lawful demense. Those wishing to visit Ormos are required to request a visa and await clearance before attempting to make landfall. All unauthorized visitors are unwelcome and looked upon with extreme prejudice. Captains needing to make landfall at Avalon for emergency repairs will not be molested, but are still required to contact me for a visa.

-- Pelinore Dragonslayer [p4s]

What is the best mix of trained peasants to have for general ventures on land?

-- Pepe the Magnificent [x4h]


Thanks to the Skulking Vermin (sx6) for finally updating the Olympia Atlas. The Atlas is a very valuable service and is very much appreciated.

Marat must be maimed! Wounds to the tyrant!


Ah, un petit verre de blanc, un morceau de gruyere sale, et la belle vue sur le lac que l'on a depuis le "Guillaume Tell", gentil petit troquet de mon Villeneuve a moi...

How do you construct a Teleportal?

Are there any intelligent turn checkers available for Olympia? Inquiring minds want to know!

Is it true that all of the rulers of Torba Bacor have all melted into the ground? An entire continent, complete with structures, available for the taking?

Once again, I have been forced by the AOO to leave my pleasant home. As I try to travel farther into the wilderness to put my past behind me, I wonder, "With the AOO in control of faery, is there any place I can go?"

Right, who's the joker leaving partially complete castles lying about?

Distressed! You think you're distressed now lady..., wait until we sick Lud & Dork your gnarley self.

he he he....

Remove floating roadblocks!

Why are gerbils fetching such a high price? Is it Marat?

"Tshup Aklathep, Infernal Star Toad with a Million Young"

Once upon a time, there was a little noble. This little noble didn't pay any attention when told that he was trespassing. He didn't read the claims made in the Times and didn't respond to email. Now, this little noble is hanging upside down in the basement, while I brew up some ratspider venom to season his little pea-sized brain. There is a lesson here, children:

"If you must be stupid, carry more cash."

Did anyone ever breed a winged ox?

Quoth the sage, "In the end there should have been only one"

Captain Ward (trad.)

Come all ye jolly mariners That love to tak' a dram, I'll tell ye o' a robber That o'er the seas did come.

He wrote a letter to his king On the eleventh o' July, To see if he wad accept o' him For his jovial company.

"Oh na, oh na," says the king, "Oh that can never be, They tell me ye are a robber, A robber on the sea."

He has built a bonnie ship, An' sent her to the sea, Wi' fower an' twenty mariners To man his bonnie ship wi'.

They sailed up an' they sailed doon, Sae stately, blythe, an' free, Till they spied the king's high Reindeer Like a leviathan on the sea.

"Why lie here, ye tinker, Ye silly, coordly thief? Why lie here, ye tinker, An' hold oor king in grief?"

They fought from one in the morning Till it was six at night, Until the king's high Reindeer Was forced to tak' her flight.

"Gae hame, gae hame, ye tinkers. Tell ye your king fae me, Though he reign king upon good dry land, I will reign king upon sea."

The Orc Oil Anonymous (OOA) Sanity Prayer =========================================

"Atnerks grant me the strength to attack the foes I can stomp; the sanity to run away from those I can't; and the smarts(*) to know the difference."

* Or at least Ross's battle simulator!!!

At last Tollus is in sight.......stand by for visitors!!!! We DO NOT come in peace!

The ranks appeared in the Times so far have been rather pathetic. Could the real big factions post some?

Chez Piere, le restuarant conu mondial, est fiere de dire qu'il a une novelle location au Canada. Comme quelqu'un a remarque "Chez Piere" etait un restaurant des Alpes Suisse, mais, malheureusement, au cause des taxes je devais demanager pendant les dernieres semaines. Encore, Chez Piere est ouvert pour votre plaisir. ----Piere du Lac "Qui, je sais que le Canada est grand mais le moitier du fun est trouver quand on chereche pour quelque chose est finalment on le trouve!"

Look closely at your "controlled" lands Mr. Anonymous, for soon they will be taken by your own mindless slaves

*** THE "CRUSTY OLD-TIMER" SPEAKS!!!!!! *** ------------------------------------------- A newbie's question: THE "CRUSTY OLD-TIMER'S" ANSWERS: How large is the world? BIG. VERY BIG. REALLY AMAZINGLY HUGE. A TOTALLY STUNNING SIZE. Has anyone reached the northernmost row of provinces? WHO WANTS TO KNOW; & WHAT BUSINESS IS IT OF YOURS, PAL?!!!

At 100 lbs apiece, these have got to be the skinniest d#@n dragons I've ever seen. Gods, they're riding horses with me! How did they get to (500,500) on the SlimFast diet?

Nietzsche once said something like "What does not kill me, makes me strong." This is a man who never tore a knee ligament. The truth is, what does not kill you, usually leaves scars. Give it some thought, before you pummel your neighbor.

Could it be? After my years of searching, a site for my castle?

The sun is blinding, Dizzy golden, dancing green, Through the park in the afternoon, Wondering where the hell, I have been.

WARNING: the Secret Brotherhood claims all the land around a certain city, which for security reasons we cannot name. Anyone entering this area will not be warned again, and will not be attacked, as that would reveal our presence. So look out.

"It has been my experience that the rocks of the elves are generally found in the middle levels of some, but not all, mine shafts." -Dorf the Dwarf (That's legal in Provinia)

The dark woods are quiet except for the sounds of falling leaves.

Ahem. Following a slight clerical error in calculating relative strengths, the attack on Mount Olympus has been postponed until g2, when we'll be able to get our retaliation in much earlier. This is the Free World, signing off.

Can a noble move if he is weighing 155% of his walking weight?

So _are_ dragons more cost effective than giant spiders?

Characters: 12 27th Men: 136 71st Gold: 7,206 38th Land controlled: 8 63rd Skills known: 29/70 46th Spells known: 7/80 93rd Provinces visited: 456/9,995 13th

We demand the instant removal of all barriers in the Atnos Channel! Signed: Those huddled masses yearning to breath free

How does one get skeletons to obey your commands?

How dangerous is it to go into Hades? Why would I want to go there anyway?

Alright, so we know that AOO has an iron grip on Faery, but why? What's special about it, other than having a front door to defend? - Obviously A Newbie

A Survey Having secured a patron and having little else to say, should I and those like me cease sending in rumors for 25 gold?

Please respond in the next times.

Here is the information on where our faction ranks in the various categories: Characters: 16 16th. Men: 470 25th. Gold: 13,209 27th. Land controlled: 23 39th. Skills known: 30/70 42nd. Spells known: 19/80 28th. Provinces visited: 630/9,995 6th. We appreciate anyone else who shares their information.

Is it safe to go to the cloudlands to learn Weather Magic, or will you get killed going through Mt. Olympus?

Warning: Visitors to Faery will be treated with extreme hostility. This means you.

---------- / \ / REST \ / IN \ / PEACE \ / \ | Palin | | sorcerer | | killed by a | | aura blast | | | |Dark Night, Year 7| *| * * * | * _________)/\\_//(\/(/\)/\//\/|_)_______

Let his fate be a warning to those who would attempt auraculation without authorization from the Master of the Black Arts.

" the wonderful thing about tiggers, is tiggers are wounderful things, they jump all over your nobles" But only if you haven't got Capture beasts in battle. As I found out.

Some appropriate quotes from THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY by Ambrose Bierce

CANNON, n. An instrument employed in the rectification of national boundaries.

CAPITAL, n. The seat of misgovernment.

COMFORT, n. A state of mind produced by contemplation of a neighbor's uneasiness.

COMMERCE, n. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of C, and for compensation B picks the pocket of D of money belonging to E.

COMMONWEALTH, n. An administrative entity operated by an incalculable multitude of political parasites, logically active but fortuitously efficient.

CONGRESS, n. A body of men who meet to repeal laws.

more next time. . .

Behold! The Purloined Letters of Bastrestric ther Archymonaged [x9i] to his son (!) Little Caesar (no, not the pizza-pizza guy), concerning the state of Things to Come:

Your late arrival, Caesar, my son, has made me spend much time in constant nightly reflection so that I could communicate with you by letter and leave you this reminder, after my death, for the benefit of all AOO minions, of which the profane spirit has vouchsafed me to know by means of Advanced Sorcery.

The key to the hidden predictions which you inherit will be locked inside my Auraculum. Also bear in mind that the events here described have not yet come to pass, and that all is ruled and governed by the power of Almighty Atnerks, inspiring us not by bacchic frenzy but by enchantments and astrological assurances: predictions have been made through the inspiration of profane will alone and the spirit of Necromancy in particular.

Bear in mind also the words: "Give not anything unholy to the dogs, nor throw pearls before swine lest they trample them with their feet and turn on you and tear you apart". For this reason keep all that you learn hidden from Marat until the day of the Vulgar Advent.

After discerning the dire import of my words, present them to Vulcan and reduce them to ashes so that none might use occult labours in searching for the perfect transmutation, whether lunar or solar, of incorruptible metals.

So come, my son, strive to understand what I have found out through my calculations which accord with revealed afflatus, because now the sword of death approaches us, with pestilence and war more glorious than there has ever been - because of three noble's work - and famine. And this sword shall smite Olympia and return to it often.

Thus we begin:

Sitting alone at night in secret study; it is placed on the brass tripod. A slight flame comes out of the emptiness and makes successful that which should not be believed in vain.

The wand in the hand is placed in the middle of the tripod's legs. With water he sprinkles both the hem of his garment and his foot. A voice, fear: he trembles in his robes. Profane splendour; the god sits nearby.

When the litters are overturned by the whirlwind and faces are covered by cloaks, the new republic will be troubled by its people. At this time the reds and the whites will rule wrongly.

(to be continued)

Translation of a poster seen in an East Provinian beer hall:

The armed AOO needs you. Join the fight, we are marching against Chaos. We are winning on all fronts, you must also work for victory. Join the Division Marat, you enter on becoming 17 years old. Defend the Fatherland, see your armed forces command recruiters.