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   | The Olympia Times                               times@olympia.rt.com |
   | June 14, 1992                                                   v4n4 |
   |                                                                      |
   |                                                                      |
   | Turn 27  127 Players                                                 |

Turn 28 orders due: Friday, June 19, 1992 Turn 29 orders due: Friday, June 26, 1992

Orders are due 6:00pm EDT, 22:00 GMT.

Questions, comments, bug reports, to play: olympia@rt.com

Last turn I wrote:

> The number of errors in this last batch of orders was considerably > less than for previous turns. Good work! If you check your orders > for errors, there's less chance that I will screw your commands up > trying to fix them. :-) Or maybe everyone is using Scott's order > checker to proofread their orders? Whatever the case, keep it up!

I plan to cut back on the amount of manual order-fixing that I do. I am partly to blame for errors in players' orders, because if I didn't keep fixing them, they wouldn't keep making the same ones turn after turn.

Common errors:

bad right --- ----- enitry, enity entity pursuade persuade terrorise terrorize end done cancle cancel delcare declare

Check your orders!

Wanted: information leading to the whereabouts of Spiney Norman. If any- one catches sight of him, please reply via the times.

The Spiney Norman Fan Club

The black and white banner -- Per pale Argent and Sable an Owl displayed counterchanged. It flew over the band of travellers moving West from Bayarth to Caburh. It was late Snowmelt and they would have to hurry to slip through the Summerbridge. "How are our guests doing?" Varian asked one of his soldiers. "Fine. Fine," he answered. "They are none to happy about the way we picked them up though." "It's for their own good, really," Varian explained. "If we left them behind, Dr. Pain, or even Seldon the Avatar or Maidez de la Montt would have captured them and probably killed them... or worse." Varian thought of the young half-elven woman, Aeira, and shuddered to think what others might have done. Murder. Worse. He found her roaming the streets of Pesbrand with a purse heavy with gold and a few trade items. No one traveled with her. She wouldn't have lasted long anyway. She was shaken yet safe here -- as were the others, without friends and easy pickings to others with harsher intentions. "I know it was for their own good," the soldier replied, "but will the others understand?" "I hope so. And I hope when we get North, the people we are taking along will understand, too. I have a bad feeling and I hope I am wrong but if I am not, people will understand..." "Do you think Maidez is still behind us?" the soldier asked. "Probably. But to what end, I don't know..."

The black and white banner -- Per pale Argent and Sable an Owl displayed counterchanged. It flew over the band of travellers as they paused in Summerbridge to take a look. It was mid-Blossom-Bloom and they wanted to move on to be sure they didn't get caught should the fall rains start early. One of Varian's soldiers returned with a soiled piece of tent cloth. It was old but the tears were new. "There are traces of a camp over there," he pointed, "with horse tracks leading off that way. It looks like the villagers, what few of them there are, looted the camp when he left. I almost didn't see it." "I had heard from Briareos' men that some poor sod got trapped here," Varian said. He looked around at the grubby villagers, just over a dozen in number. "It'll be a wonder if he didn't go crazy." Varian walked over to a rusted Olympia Times box chained to a tree. He dropped a gold coin into the box and removed a crisp copy of the latest edition and perused its pages. He stopped at Oleg's "Interesting Player List" for an update. "Let's see, Dr. Pain, Bastrestric, Seldon the Avatar, Mohammad ibn Musa al-whatever, John Smith, Varian, Maidez de la Montt... WAIT!" Varian looked back a line. "Varian [856] -- Attacked a bunch of independent units in Pesbrand on turn 25. This isn't that that interesting except for the scale," he read aloud. "Hmm," Touchstone said. "Me thinks you caught his eye. I wonder why?" "But--but--but I reported it to Oleg myself! I even posted a notice offering recompense for anyone inconvenienced by this action!" "Perhaps he's only being fair," Touchstone offered, "listing both friend and foe in there." "Great. Now everyone is going to flee before me like some murderer! We have never killed a single soul! Not even any of the Men in Black!" Varian looked back at his prisoners. He would have to decide what to do with them at some point. "My anti-Pain credentials are exemplary!" "I think they'll understand, sir," one of the soldiers offered. "Give it some time." Varian calmed down a bit. Next to the newspaper box was a pile of discared yellowed papers. Varian picked one up and looked at the front. "Volume 3, Number 4. I guess they only get two editions per year up here." He looked around at the peasant hovels and sighed. Looking down the front page, a headline caught his eye -- "MURDERER RUNS RIOT IN CHARDIA". "Hey, get this. Dr. Pain's rise to power." Varian's men gathered around him. A few of the prisoners looked over with some curiosity. "Listen..." "The obituraries of this last month, read like a slaughterhouse roll-call," the article began, "Apparently 'The Black Company' [1301] went on a killing rampage, massacring 15 innocent inhabitants of the area." Varian read on, through a plea of the survivors of Chardia to rise up and kill him, though a description of the now dead Zyzak as a "mad dog" before he gathered his army, though another plea to the citizens of Habyn, Camaris, and West Habyn to band together and arrest "this maniac" -- executing him if necessary, and finally to an ominous warning. Varian paused for a moment and read the final line. "Speak now ! Later you may be DEAD !!" A chill ran down his spine as a cold breeze came up from the south. He knew it had started. "It's too late, isn't it..." the faint voice said from among the prisoners. Aeira Half-Elven looked at him with a look that could pierce stone. "...for the people down South," she finished. Maybe she felt it, too. "It may be. If they don't make it though, they could all be dead by this time next year. I wish them luck. I wish there was something I could do to help..." Varian's looked South and let his voice trail off. It wasn't until after they left Summerbridge that word from the South arrived. The slaughter had started. Moira Bloodhands, Sir Kaypro, Definesser, Roz Dixfinger, the Labor Force killed in Aethelarn, Elak Frusengladje, Nebulus Sock, Lirrin killed in Ociera, The Menageria Company killed in Ilion, and Loners killed in Habyn, by Pain, his lackeys, and Seldon the Avatar no doubt. They all hung their heads low in a moment of silence. Pain would not be happy until only those who vowed allegiance to him remained in the South. There was more carnage to come. For some of those in the South, it was indeed too late. But one day, they would be avenged -- by Varian's own hands if need be...

Camaris Police Report =====================

No action worth mentioning occured in Camaris last turn.

This report is a reqular feature in the Times, and always ends with the most up to date wanted list.

WANTED ======

Mohammed ibn Musa al-Khwarizmi [819], for assault and kidnapping. Band of Mamelukes [1464], for assault and kidnapping. one-eyed Kalendars [1977], for assault and kidnapping.

The Town Council of Camaris [355]

He Ye all whome would conduct foul practise then flee to the skirts of our faire Guild of Magicians.

Let it be known, that Our guild offers protection only to they whome raise no hand against Our fellow man. Any members who committe crimes against their fellows shall gain no protetion from Our august body.

Know it also that until such times as guild is proven to Our satisfaction all members accused of said crimes are in Our eyes innocent.

Be it known that Tim the magician is, until more evidence is heard, considered to be under Our protection. His incarceration is accepted until his guilt be proven or disproven in Our eyes, but his slaying or conversion by means faire or foul will be regarded as a crime against the guild itself.

I have spoken.

Merlinium the Grey, Guildmaster magician of Olympia.

"Another man would beam with joy, to be hoist to such a height I assure -- but I, sir, am no architect nor do I plan to be." Touchstone backed up to the door of the tent. He looked a little nervous. "This could be the door to happiness,' he gestured to the tent opening, "a window on a new life -- but for another -- that Guges chap perhaps, but I have no draw towards the making of structures." "I, sir, am already an architect -- an architect of joy to those who watch me raise the house from upon the stage. 'Tis my only ambition, to hear the hammer of hand against hand in rejoice!" "Touchstone..." Varian attempted to interrupt. "My tools, sir, are my voice and wit, not chisel and square -- 'less it is a town square," Touchstone laughed nervously at his own joke. Varian took advantage of the pause to interrupt. "Stop! You are the only one who can study construction quickly enough to make a difference. Didn't you say you memorized the Hamlet play in a night?" "But -- but -- but..." for once Touchstone was tongue-tied. Varian put the construction tome in Touchstones hand and closed his fingers around its cover. "Do it. You have to. Pretend it is a particularly boring but popular soliloquy" "But I won't enjoy it." "You don't have to." "I always wondered why my parents named me 'Touchstone' and now I know," Varian could hear the entertainer say as he walked over to the fire. Varian knew he was the best one for the job...

Phillipe, Stryder (or is it the other way around?) just don't mistake any of my lads or lassies to be...'zombies' and we'll get along fine. We have enough Pain around here without you two setting up your own private fleecing operation. In your service, Sarogin Bellewood

Oleg the Loudmouth's Interesting Player List ============================================

This is a list if people you might want to watch out for, because they've done, erm, "interesting" things in the past. Attacking independent units is no longer considered "interesting" IF there is independent confirmation that the units were indeed independent.

Note that obituaries are no longer promptly reported, if at all -- so you'll have to watch & contribute to this list to see what's going on.

New entries this turn: Dr. Pain update, Spiney Norman explains, and the Tylenol Gang in Kircarth captures an allegedly inactive newbie.

Dr. Pain [814] -- Killed at least 20 players. Known throughout the world as an efficient and wealthy but evil dude. On turn 26, he was personally killing people in Caburh and his minion Despair was killing people in Ociera. Units owned: 1034 1301 1321 1368 1376 1461 1475 1575 1580 1585 1976 1993 2002 2040 2055.

Bastrestric ther Archymonaged [801] -- Killed 1 unit on turn 23 in Chardia, which Milinkthos claims was independent. Listed as a buddy by Dr. Pain; hasn't denied it in public (to the best of my memory, feel free to refresh it.) Studies in the Tower in Chardia.

Seldon the Avatar [809] -- killed 1863 in Pesbrand on turn 20. Killed 1 player and 3 units in Ilion on turn 23. Units owned: 1400. 5,000 gold bounty offered by Tony Wayland [572] for "Seldon the Avatar and all his units."

Mohammed ibn Musa al-Khwarizmi [819] -- Attacked newbie player in Ilion on turn 21, but was unable to beat one man. Attacked 2 units in Camaris on turn 23. Wanted by John Smith. Units owned: 819 1464 1977.

John Smith [823] -- killed unit that killed player 830 and others in Chardia (i.e., apparently 830 was pro-Pain and the attacker was anti-Pain, then John Smith killed the attacker.); killed 4 other units in Camaris since, which he says were independent. Says he is the protector of Camaris. Units owned: 1317 1494 1935 1972?.

Maidez de la Montt [868] -- Attempted to kill 6 players turns 21-23, but all failed. Attacked 3 players in Pesbrand on turn 25 for booty. Units owned: 1991 1995 1998 2007 2012.

Spiney Norman [878] -- Apparently the owner of Fengal's Hoodlums [2037], which killed a newbie on turn 23 in Kircarth. Fengal's Hoodlums was captured turn 24, and the combat reports lists 878 as the faction of Fengal's Hoodlums. Spiney claims that he was framed, and the owner gave him the unit at the start of turn 24. Truth or fiction? You be the judge.

Stryder [898] -- Attacked a player on turn 25, who successfully fled. Phillipe [905] -- Attacked the same player. These guys claim that they thought this player was independent and were out to guard his gold for him. Uhuh. The victim wasn't independent, he just doesn't answer his email as promptly as some.

A mass of newbies, including 879, 877, 881, 882, 876, and 883, attacked player 880 in Kircarth. They say that this player was inactive, so they captured him and took his gold.

Sightings last turn: ====================

Dr. Pain [814] was in Caburh with 77 men and leadership 3. Despair was in Ociera with 71 men.

If you believe any information on this list is incorrect, please write me. If you would like to contribute information, especially combat reports and/or sighting reports, please write. Information is like a breath of fresh air: it makes everyone's day happier.

-- Oleg the Loudmouth

Here's your big chance to contribute to Oleg the Loudmouth's Map and Lore Archive! We are now seeking new information... if you have a new-style entry for something with only an old-style entry in my map, feel free to send it in. If you have the lore sheet for any of the artifacts 70-73, feel free to send them in. These only take 7 days and no skill to acquire.

The map has been updated a bit, with sea information from Drassa down to Merinth plus more new-style entries added.

-- Oleg the Loudmouth [810]

Roving Reporter's Column ========================

Rally to the Cause !! =====================

So far, Dr Pain has remained in his protectorate of Chardia and Habyn terrorising the natives and either killing them, enslaving them to his will or driving them away. Sooner or later, he is bound to realise that there is a much wider world out there, and leap across the Summerbridge link to the outside world, there to spread his depravities even wider afield.

Will this status be allowed to continue ? Can we allow it to continue ? Will no-one take up arms against this murdering dog and remove him from our presence before his bad example rubs off on others in the world ?

Will those who led the attack in Drassa to slay the murderer Zyzak not take up arms against him and slay him ?

I ask all inhabitants willing to join in such an attack to mail to Rocko [585], Kaspar [581], Prenola [516], Evor [511], Gabriel Synthon [521], and Merlinium [537] and pledge your support, and beg them to once more take up the mantle of leadership in these hard times !

Join up now ! Beg them for aid in these troubled times ! Who knows, even I might join the rush !

Fellow OLympians! I stand unfairly accused of a heinious crime.Apparently I'm wanted in Ragnar for molesting farm animals..if they want me that badly their going to have to pay me more! (I guess it beats playing the piano for entertainment value). I just want to make two points: i) I have a degree in animal husbandry - I know what I'm doing,and I assure you that the poor creatures do not suffer (much). ii) If I'd have known that the Knights of the Watch were the 'Kiss and tell' type I would never have touched them in the first place. Regards.. Silk Hobarth

Internal memo: To: The inhabitants of Olympia (unsavory lot that you are) RE: Media saturation.

I think it's about time that someone brought up the subject of media saturation.. for those of you that went to Remedial school you will realise that I'm not talking about the particulaly rainy month we had earlier in the year,but about people - who to earn a few gold crowns,bombard the Times with a dozen or so letters every week that the rest of us have to wade through to get to the buxon Amazon page. For example,I noticed that last week five (or was it six) articles ranging from complete drivel (perhaps it was seven) to utter c**P were set in by the same individuals. I am of course,refering to the Ragnar Boyz, whose cutting wit and complete avarice left us all in such awe..(actualy it was probably six).Really,what some lengths people will go to. (article 3 of 90). p.s. It really was a wet month in Snowmelt this year wasn't it? It certainly brought out a lot of Faery-folk '(we had another name for them when I was a lad..) last month - oh and piles,mustn't forget them.. I'm a martyr to them I am.

Hello folks, Silk Howbarth here, how does the idea of an agony column grap you? Yes,just write to me Silk at gmorley@rpms.ac.uk (yes,yes it's a funny name for a pub - we've had that joke already) with your problems,and I'll cogitate a bit..and Voila,as they say in Drassa,I'll have the answer printed out for you in the next edition of the times. (Free of charge,naturaly). Hoping to hear from you soon.. Silk Howbarth (Esq.)

Internal memo: To: The Inhabitants of Olympia Subject: Droping's

Hello all, I was browsing through the Olympian bible the other day (as you do) and I noticed that their was no Command for dropping unwanted items! I mean,what happens when your in a Run-like-buggery situation and you find that your unable to move because your loaded down with all your worldly goods (ie:evicted again). You either have to SELL them or Give them to somebody..this is naturaly a great disadvantage to one whom is both an arrant coward and avaricious. (Cowards run in my family..a cousin of mine was at the battle of Chardia when the first arrow was fired - he was back home under his bed by the time the second one was,,,well that's not exactly true,he was in fact hacked messily into tiny pieces by the Red Guard,and Dr.Pain ended up making balloon animals out of his small intestine..but you get my point). If anyone out there would care to comment ie: those of you who can read,you can contact me at gmorley@rpms.ac.uk (I know it's a strange name for an Inn I grant you,I can only pronounce it when I'm pis@@ed. Give my regards to Uncle Jeremy.. Silk Hobarth Esq.

Internal memo: To: The Inhabitants of Olympia RE:Oleg Loudmouth.

I just wanted to express my opinion of this fellow in public (the thought of the 25gp. that I'm getting aside). This man is a Paragon! Which is to say he is not an armoured type of ant-eater - but a really good guy! Not only does he keep us up to date each week on the current where-abouts of all those psycho-thirteen year olds such as Dr.Pain et al (just kidding Doc.) but also provides a fairly comprehensive map of the Old World FREE OF CHARGE upon request! On the subject of Dr.Pain,he has apparently put a bounty on Olegs head because of this info.Whats up Doc?Are you insane?(whoops, touchy subject),Every great,psychotic, mass-murdering dictator has had a bio- grapher..Don't you realise that Oleg is doing a great deal to keep the Pain myth going,and you name on peoples lips? (true,your slaughtering all those newbie immigrants as soon as they get off the boats helps..).You should PAY people not to kill him - or better still anounce that you'll put a bounty (or some other chocolate snack) on the head of anyone who so much as smiles at him in a funny way! Your Roving (well,running/fleeing) reporter Silk Hobarth Esq. signing off.

ADVERTISEMENT: This is to announce the formation of the SILK HOBARTH PUBLICITY COMPANY. Do you have social problems?Are you rich but ignored?Do you want to improve your public image (This ones for you Doc!) Send me details of your character (eg:his name) and his accomplishments, and I'll make up enougth Hype to catapult you from a complete unkown (this ones for you Ragnar Boyz!) into the public EYE... send you details to gmorley@rpms.ac.uk Warning:all information will be treated as strictly confidential and WILL NOT appear in any form,in 'Silk Hobarths Agony Column' (which is a kind of stone people are tied to and beaten - and which is also starting next week in the Times..)

Internal memo: To: Anyone over the age of twelve. RE: Serial-drivel

It's bad enougth that people publish trash like this in the Times to earn a bit of cash - but why,WHY do people continuously feel the need to serialise their exploits every week in this paper? Is it some mis-beggoten urge for fame? What makes it worse is that they have nothing new to write about! Eg: " Hulk strode into the bar and glared around him - no dared stir beneath his mighty gaze,silently he ordered another drink (I mean,how on earth do you do that I ask you?).He noticed a scant clad woman at the bar and strolled * over. "Hrugh!" he grunted in a masculine way. Continued Next week at the same time!

* strolling's like walking except your pissed. Utter,utter drivel. I must confess,I quite enjoyed Spiney Normans confession time last week - you know - he just left it at the part where he was going to turn himself in.... However this did not seem to have the makings of a dreadfull serial..especialy, like those of you who study the 'Name changes' section of the News report will have noticed he's now become Ethelred the Unready (nice try Norm.). The point I'm trying to make is only the people who never actualy DO anything except hang around in bars recruiting pimps write this stuff - I mean look at Dr.Pain..how often does he write a serial? This is one underated guy - he's performed numerous civic improvement schemes (involving whips and pyramids),helped the unemployment situation (everyone in Chardia is now in the army),cut down on immigration (at least in chardia),the list is endless! (As you can see I proscribe to a policy of S.U.B.G. (Sucking Up to the Big Guys)). Let's all make an effort to rid our paper of these moronic utterances (it's worse than sesame street - at least that makes me laugth). Silk Hobarth Esq. (P.S.A.)* * Personality Soluble in Alcahol.


SLAP! Ew gross.

Oleg turned over in his bunk. Damn bugs. The boat rocked and creaked. Waitacottonpickingminute! We're in the middle of the damn ocean, why are there bugs in here?

Blearily, Oleg staggered to his feet, shook his head to clear then hangover, and donned his sailor suit -- shapeless pants made of burlap. Slowly, he climbed the short flight of stairs to the deck.

"Yo, helmsman! Are we near land?"

"Yes, Your Loudness! We're not quite sure what land, though. It seems to be some new, unexplored territory. Or perhaps Drassa. I'm not really sure."

"Waddayoumean, you're not sure? Even an idiot can tell the difference between virgin lands and Drassa!"

"Well, if you hadn't been so stingy about buying me navigation aids..."

Sigh. Good help was so hard to find these days. Oleg peered through the mist, trying to make out the shape of the land. What would landfall bring? A market to replinish the rapidly-diminishing ale supply? The stronghold of Dr. Pain? The lair of the mythical Sea Kings? Only time would tell. Yawn. Time for a nap, methinks.

* * * The Dragaeran Trading Company Reminds You Yet Again * * *

The Olympia turn checker!

It's a floor wax! It's a dessert topping!

This marvel of the mideval age reads in turn commands, checks syntax, and prints out an english version of the commands for easy checking. No longer will you buy 5 of 6 instead of 6 of 5. It also does reasonability checks (ie. you can't buy Osswid, and you can't terrorize a rug).

Binaries for Next, Vax, Sparc, Decstation and Sun3 machines running UNIX are available from shrimp.cs.washington.edu in pub/olympia. Source code is NOT available, so don't ask.

Comments/questions/bug reports to hauck@cs.washington.edu.

Note: For bug reports, please include the line that triggered the bug, and the output the checker gave.

A messenger arrived to bring an urgent note to the offices of StarLight Courier out in Cnossa. A clerk was dutifully at his desk filling out the books.

"I have an urgent message for Tony Wayland" the messenger panted.

The clerk looked up. "And you are....?"

"A messenger for Karl Marx, the representative of the warrior's guild here in Cnossa. It's urgent. Your master must see this at once."

The clerk tilted his head. "Concerning...."

"A dreaded enemy in out midst. The Black knight has entered Cnossa! We must band together and defeat him at once... Our women and children! Our.."

The clerk held his hand up. "Yes, I'm quite sure that's very interesting. But you must understand that Mr. Wayland is a busy man. Just have a seat and I'll let you know when he'll be ready to see you."


"Yelling out threats for death and destruction won't get you in any faster..." he turned back to the book keeping.

The messenger looked around at the dust and cobwebs covering all the skeletals remains lying on the nearby couches. He opened his mouth as to say something and then closed it up again.



Tony Wayland sighed and folded up another paper airplane. "I don't understand it, Dora, why aren't people using our business?" He was talking to the stuffed teddy bear lying on his desk. "I've been open up for nearly a year now and I've gotten absolutely no responses in ages." He threw the paper airplane and it flew out the window and landed it in the pile of similar planes. He stared out at the window and looked at the once battle hardened troops reduced to digging ditches for a living.

Wait! What was that? Tony stood up in alarm and drew his trusty sword. He looked dumbfounded as he saw a paper plane fly back in through his window. Curious, he stooped to pick it up and read.


Tony arrived with his troop of archers all in ringmail and longbows. 34 men all together. He looked around at the others. He spotted Karl Marx across the way explaining tactics in front of a large group sturdy men.

Tony blinked. "Is that all we have?" He espied a trollop and a well dressed man sitting on the side. "Hey, babe, like what's your sign?" he asked the lady before him.

"Dollar sign" was the reply. A woman after my own heart, Tony thought.

"A look's free, but, like my pimp will be expecting some serious coinage this month."


"Yeah, Pimp. I'm Prenola's Prostitute..."

"Oh." said Tony who was suddenly disinterested.

They got together and tony surveyed the group responding to the call of arms. 34 archers. 46 what looked like miners. Himself. Karl Marx. A Whore and Prefect. "Gee guys, do you think we can all take 7 men?"


"Ouch." Tony looked around. "6 dead?" The ravages of combat had ripped through Cnossa. But they won. Boy did they win.

"7 , sir", said an archer.

"7? Who else? I'm not including losses that weren't mine."

"Our clerk."

"Oh good, maybe then business will pick up."


Weeks later...

"Well, Dora, if we fold the wings back like so, I'm sure we can achieve a better ability to catch updraft so as to make it do acrobatics when I throw --" Tony stopped as he heard a knock on the door. He put the paper and Dora under his desk and looked busy.

A beaming courier walked in. Dust covered his clothes. It seemed as if he hadn't slept in weeks. Unshaven, smelly. Boy, this is true courier, Tony thought.

The courier beamed. "Good news, sir!"


"Yes, we just convinced Falchan's War Birds to switch factions and join us, sir!"

"You did? What unit are you in, man."

"Pactra, sir."

"So they decided to join us, have they? Where are they? Are they good men? Strong fighters?"

The courier nodded vigourously. "Gave a good fight, those lads did. Right spunky, sir. Why they would have beaten Prenola were they even odds."

"WHAT??!!! Would have? Prenola? huh?"

"Well sir, they were sorta on the losing side of a battle."

"You mean Prenola attacked my men?"

"Well, not exactly. Prenola has captured them, not killed , really, sir. And.. uh.. they weren't really on our side at the time..."

Tony's eyes narrowed. "Explain."


"You mean to say. You went and visited this group who was captured by Prenola. Bribed a guard to sneak in the documents, and had them sign it in hopes they can be freed? And you're telling me you spent 2 weeks on this?"

The courier nodded.

"You're dismissed. Get some sleep and some food. For Skrenta's sake go wash up and get a shave. You stink, soldier."

Tony Wayland sighed and took out another piece of paper. This time he started to write a letter. "Dearest Prenola, It seems that you have captured two of our men...." Hell, it couldn't hurt.

Starlight Courier - A laugh a minute. Burma Shave.

Dear Sir,

I been writing articles for you news paper for several months now, and I have yet to get paid. Every time I try to contact you accounts payable department, I either get put on hold indefinitely, or simply transferred to your editor for the homeless (who is doing a fine job I might as).

Would you please look into my paycheck please. My family wants to go out a kill Oleg, but we need the money.


Sincerely, Down and Out Adventurer

The day begins. Stryder speaks to the troops. "Men, today we march to glory. Today, we go to make a new homeland for ourselves. A homeland full of opportunity, riches and glory. Are you with me?" There is a cheer from the men. "Then follow me!"

As Stryder, triumphantly marches off to a new far away land, the men head back to the Lonesome Oaf Tavern, and the security of the arms of Wanda and her wenches.

Nest Week - The Obituary.

-- 4730 commands for 690 units