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   | The Olympia Times                                        issue g1-88 |
   | Februrary 28, 1996                                                   |
   |                                                                      |
   | turn 88  137 players                   http://www.pbm.com/oly/times/ |

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Olympia PBEM

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Player-contributed press

Well everyone has their preference. I don't waste much time on pikemen in the front row. They last about as much time as a peasant against a spider or the like. I prefer to put my peasants, workers, and sailors in the front row with my ship captain. While they take turns dieing and wasting the spiders time, I take pot shots at them from row 8 with lots of crossbowmen. I can't tell if my catapults in the front row are taking hits or not, but not many of my front line actually die. In row 9 I put my beastmaster with a couple spare peasants in case all my sailors die. This protects the one who will gather in the spiders, which are the real prize, and makes sure I can sail away again. The ship captain is protected because he is the stack leader and takes hits last.

-- The day of Rest [ju3]

---------------------- S. CAMARIS Update ----------------------

Monthly notice: any new visitors to our fair isle should notify us in advance.

-- The Crazy Quilters [vn7]

___ ___ ___ / / ) / ) /___ /___/ /___/ / . _ _ /_ / )_ __ / / _ _ . __ . _ / / / _> / /___/(_>/ //< of / / (_)|// / // (_>

The First Bank of Provinia has offices in some of the major cities on the continent of Provinia. The FBoP offers the following facilities.

o Special offers for New Olympia Players. o Excellent Interest Rates on Bank Accounts. o A Fast and Efficient Courier Service. o Money Transfers. o Short and Long Term Loans. o Insurance Policies. o Pawn Broking Service.

Call in at your local branch for further details.

-- First Bank of Provinia [v0z]

Customer Testamonial on behalf of the First Bank of Provinia

Greetings, Provinians! My name's Jech Ercheflo the Friendly Thin Guy. I'm a Trader. I travel Provinia buying and selling and trading everything from the highest grade avinia leaf to the cheap woven baskets that I buy off of broke lowlifes in Imperial City. Now as you might imagine, with half-breeds like Swishbuckler bending everyone in sight, Provinia is not always as friendly and peaceful as me. So I don't like carrying large amounts of cash on a trade run, if you know what I mean. That's why I bank at First Provinia: low-interest loans, high interest rates, newbie bonuses, warehouse facilities, shipping services... What else could you ask for?

So take it from me, Jech Ercheflo the Friendly Thin Guy, don't wind up lying in the gutters of Imperial City weaving baskets. Give the the First Bank of Provinia a call. You'll be glad you did.

-- Jech Ercheflo the Friendly Thin Guy [h3f]

Swishbuckler 2 - he's back, and this time he's someone else!

The anonymous owner of bandit Swishbuckler has saved up some more noble points and dragons and sent them out to slaughter newbie nobles again. This time it's Erik the Pink [l0r], currently in ci20 attacking all unarmed nobles.

Happily, his tactics are still no better than his morals and he avoids taking any profit from this activity by executing all captives at once. (I'd hate to take on someone this fierce if he was any good at the game)

Until he's caught and eaten, right-thinking people should avoid the Ilion/Atnos area unless armed to deal with him. Contact me for updates or to help in the hunt.

Seen here: Erik the Pink [l0r], with 54 winged horses, 50 dragons

-- Erik the Well Read [l4o]


Now, that we know BtA still exists, how about someone providing a vision?

Heavy reigns of mercy

From the war diaries of Keldar, Commander 1st Air Corps:

The Rimmon campaign reached something of a climax as the armies of Math came out of hiding for a showdown. Over a thousand enemy troops including over six hundred crossbowmen massed against us. By a quirk of fate, I found myself at the center of the lines and so it fell to me to lead our troops. We lost well over 100 major beasts, and many smaller ones, but the men were no match for our armies. But never have I seen such valor: they died to a man, fighting to the last. I still recall the scene at the end: a lone crossbowman remaining standing, his comrades lying dead as far as the eye can see, an entire phalanx of dragons closing in. Calmly he loads a quarrel into his bow, raises it to his shoulder and fires. It was enough to make one wish a dragon would fall, to honor his memory. Such courage could not go unrewarded, and I resolved to give these men what they were fighting for: I ordered that the city not be sacked, and its people spared.

We occupied Oleg's castle, and took control of Castle Calculus. In the east, the Halls of Disorder fell, as did Castle Escher in Chaos Centre; casualties were light.

Elements of 1st Air and 1st Mobile were combined to bring 2nd Air back up to full strength, and we pulled duty doing pacification. It's one thing to slam into a conveniently stationary castle, quite another to hunt down the scattered remnants. Incredibly, the entire High Command staff was struck down by flu, and recent directives have been garbled and incomplete. This had better change soon, or the remaining enemy elements will slip through our fingers rather than being properly cleaned up.

Is there a new Answer Man, or did he just get dumber?


We read rumors of peace in the times.

But in the land I've visited, peace is only a rumor.

Although there seems to have been an information blackout, or boycott (perhaps those engaged in war think the readership of the Times an unworthy audience), let it hereafter be known to all that the trials & tribulations of war have not departed from fair Olympia.

Oh! Atnerks forgive us, but we simple men are driven to murder & rape our neighbors by our greed!

Alas, Deep in the South, among the rolling hills of Rimon, the AOO & MAFOC have slaughtered one another with great abandon. Note also how in the cold North the heroes of the free people everywhere, the Sons of Dogmatix, battle still to maintain their God-given gift of life against the tyranny of the Whicked Ancient Order. Truly, the AOO hath given chase to their enemies all over the globe (or cylinder, properly)!

Oh Ancient Order of Sin! Oh Unholy Juggernaught which all fear! Oh evil of evil! You who are a blackness unto yourself! One day (maybe), the freedom-loving peoples of Olympia will rise up & slaughter thee (hopefully) with righteous ecstasy! The people await only a noble champion to lead the way! As was said before (a long time before),

The Liberator Cometh!

Like a freedom train, a holy roller, a scourge cleansing rain, the Liberator's forces grow & grow. His plans ripen, his armies grow, his brood increases! With both hands shall he slaughter thee, the left & the right!

Justice will flow as a river of your blood, oh godless tyrants, oh you who rule in the city where the devil is your footsoldier (probably not an exageration!), your days are but as a handsbreath! Remember your glory: cold comfort will it be to you in the grave, wither the Liberator shall send thee, shortly.

Someone Asked: > Why does the "Clan with No Name" have no name?

Well, you see, they once had a name, and a very nice one at that. Everyone liked them because they had such a nice name.

Then one day, while they were hanging abount in the Imperial City, someone offered them a trade. No one is quite certain who this person was, but most believe he was a member of the AOO (after all, aren't they involved in all evil doings in Olympia?). This person said he had some magic beans, which would grow a beanstalk that would reach all the way up to the cloudlands, eliminating the need to fly to get there. The catch was that he wanted the Clan's name in exchange for the beans.

The Clan thought about it, and took a vote. By a narrow margin, it was decided to go for the beans, figuring that they could afford a new name with the riches they'd steal from the giant which they expected to find there (no one is quite sure just *why* they expected to find a giant there).

Unfortunately, the bean salesman turned out to really be an orc-oil salesman (But the Lords of Revelstone claim he isn't one of theirs, and they *do* have a reputaion of being honest). No giant beanstalk grew when the beans were planted. A very nice crop of lima beans did grow, but the plants never got more than a few feet tall.

So now the Clan has no name. They do, however have a very nive lima bean farm on the eastern edge of the Imperial City.

Someone Else Asked: > So, if *everyone* knows about the AOO passing characters > as they drop, then it cannot be cheating. Right?

Reserving judgement on whether passing characters is cheating, it should be pointed out that just because everyone knows that something is going on, that doesn't make it "not cheating".

Yet Someone Else Asked: >what is the use of a sacred grove ??????

Probably a good place for collecting rare foliage.

And Somebody *Else* Asked: > When one eats the brains of a noble who had skills that cost > extra noble points(like Magic), does one get those skills > without expending noble points?

Gee, that'd be *really* nice, wouldn't it?

-- The Answer Guy

_The Enlightened Man_

Shogen asked: "Why does the enlightened man not stand on his feet and explain himself?" And he also said: "It is not necessary for speech to come from the tounge."

is it possibel to catch horses in a pasture ????

Why does the Clan With No Name keep trying this?

What do you want for nothin'?

-- Elwood

More money for not so mundane purposes!

Swishbuckler's dead! Long live Swishbuckler!

Please tell me it ain't so, Joe!

So, if *everyone* knows about the AOO passing characters as they drop, then it cannot be cheating. Right?

Lotta people park in handicapped spaces and get away with it. You find that admirable? A rule you break, written or otherwise, is always and forever broken, whether you get away with it or not, and the memory of it will always sully everything you touch, do, and are. Of course, you can always lie to yourself. It's how a lot of the human race gets out of bed in the morning. Works for me. Besides, it's just a game, isn't it. Or does it mean more than that to you?

-A retired dope peddler

the seas grow angry without the smell of blood

Obviously you're on a different shore from the rest of us. Count your blessings.

The AOO is the strongest aliance in the game. They can only be defeated by an aliance of the rest of us. The time has come to take down the Chataux.

Is This War?

"A sandwitch walks into a bar, and says to the barman. "a pint of lager, please" The barmen answers. "Sorry we don't serve food here"..............DA.DA The joker.

Is it possible to get a map of this land?

"It's easier to hate me than to face the truth in my words."