minstrel: OK, so I was surfing the net...

Greg Lindahl lindahl at pbm.com
Tue Mar 21 23:22:30 PST 2006

It started really innocently, as it always does. I am preparing an
edition of Thomas Morley's "Plain and Easy Introduction to Practical
Music", and so I was googling around to see what already existed.

One of the hits was an anagram website, www.anagrammy.com. Anagrams
are rearrangements of the letters in a phrase into different words,
preferably funny ones. It turns out that one of the anagrammists,
James H. Young, has rearranged Morley's definition of a Madrigal...
well, let's just say that if you're a Britney Spears fan, you should
stop reading now:


A Plain and Easy Introduction to Practical Music (1597)

The Madrigal.

"As for the music it is, next unto the Motet, the most artificial and,
to men of understanding, most delightful. If therefore you will
compose in this kind you must possess yourself with an amorous humour
(for in no composition shall you prove admirable except you put on and
possess yourself wholly with that vein wherein you compose), so that
you must in your music be wavering like the wind, sometime wanton,
sometime drooping, sometime grave and staid, otherwhile effeminate;
you may maintain points and revert them, use Triplas, and show the
very uttermost of your variety, and the more variety you show the
better shall you please."

Thomas Morley, Gentleman of the Chapel Royal


A Plain and Easy Introduction to Commercial Music

The Pop Tune

"Hi. Our modern music is well delivered when the artist has a moody,
appealing look. That should mean mondo tits, sumptuous ass, two hot
sexy lips, a vapid toothy facial expression. You should use silicone
to achieve the most yummy or effective tits. The same for the lips and
the bum. Do not worry, the face will survive on its own merit. You
must not emerge in public with fewer than nine private guards. You
must get in the news with any foolish rumor that may surround you. If
there are not any, someone may start one for you. It will likely
improve your image- the most important of things in life. Also the
money, the men, fame, and shoes too."

For tour dates, do call my manager at 1-555-7062

Britney Spears (1981- )

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