minstrel: teaching

[Cynthia J Ley]

What a frustrating situation.

I had a similar experience a few years ago. I'm a Music & Other Stuff
Laurel--if someone comes to me within the context of the Society and asks
to become a student, it's part of my Laurel duty to teach them. It's part
of their duty to take it seriously (I have no patience with flakes). My
music students have all done pretty well and I am proud of them--they
earned their accolades.

However, a few years ago some people in our shire wanted to start a Music
Night. I've been directing a cappella choirs for nearly 20 years and was
asked if I could kick-start it. I said sure, but I did not want to be
stuck directing it, and made that very clear from the onset.

What happened? To make a long story short, people floated in and out of
the group at will (and, as any choir director knows, this makes it
impossible to plan anything), music had to be taught over and over and
*over,* and I finally said enough and quit. It wasn't what I had signed
up for, but everyone kept treating me like I was their director despite
numerous efforts on my part ot have other do this, and refused to take
any personal responsibility for learning material or bringing in new
stuff to learn, despite this being well within the capabilities of
several of the people taking part, including the hosts. It was
exhausting.

I decided I was never going to do a teaching choir again; since then,
started a performance choir which has certain expectations of its
members, and we are all doing very well, not only musically but in terms
of personal satisfaction too.

You didn't sign up to be their teacher. I think you need to explain the
reality of the situation to them, and that what they are doing is an
imposition to you. Mentoring someone along is one thing, but this is
quite another. Offer them other resources if you can, and perhaps suggest
getting together with them every month or so where you can all share your
progress. 

Arlys


> I thought I'd ask this list for advice on a situation that might 
> have happened to some of you. Where do you draw the line when
encouraging
> people in the bardic arts, so as to avoid the result that people
> innocently assume they have an open-ended opportunity for free 
> individual tuition?
> 
> I've had a couple of people decide to take up an instrument, and 
> come to
> me for advice and guidance. So far I've been happy to help, e.g. in
> lending them an instrument to try out, advising them on acquiring 
> their
> own (including helping them make it and or get it well set up), 
> showing
> them the basics of how to play, suggesting books and giving them 
> music,
> recording examples for them to listen to, offering them tips and 
> feed-back
> on how they are doing etc. However the result was that they, 
> effectively,
> started turning up weekly for their next "lesson". This was not a
> situation that I was comfortable with as I'm not actually a music 
> teacher,
> just a bit more advanced on the instrument than they are, and 
> moreover, if
> I was getting that kind of individual musical tuition from someone 
> else,
> I'd normally expect to be paying for it.
> 
> What I'd prefer is if they joined in our regular 'music practice', 
> where a
> small group of varying abilities work through various pieces 
> together.
> This may often involve me in supplying much of the music and advice, 
> but
> it is in an informal context where I get to practice at the same 
> time.
> However they are unwilling to do this because they feel they are not 
> yet
> good enough to join in. Alternatively I'd be happy if at some other
> regular meetings or events they took me aside occasionally to talk 
> about
> how they are getting on. I've tried saying 'well, I don't think 
> there's
> much more I can teach you' but this is not really true. Having 
> gently
> discouraged them from expecting a weekly meeting, they are still 
> asking
> (politely) whether we can arrange a further individual session some
> time...Is there any tactful way to say 'no', or have I got myself 
> stuck
> here?
> 
> Caitlin
> 
> 
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