minstrel: teaching

[Lisa and Ken Theriot]

Hi Caitlin!

You wrote:

[Is there any tactful way to say 'no', or have I got myself stuck
here?]

You're certainly not stuck unless you want to be; how much tact versus
force is required will depend on the individual in question (whether
they are at the "a little guilt will do" end of the continuum or the
"cricket bat required" end).  A few ideas:

Make a list of (paid) teachers nearby who can help them.  Hand it over
and say, "Here, any of these people are more experienced at teaching
this instrument than I am, and I'm sure they'd love to have a new
student, and could see you on a regular basis.  If you really want to
progress, this is the way to do it."  You can also mention that a
professional teacher will give them "more bang for their buck" as it
were, since they will not be apt to chat or talk about anything except
the matter at hand.  (And it occasionally pays dividends; Ken's former
voice teacher at Huntingdon Music College joined the King's Singers, so
now we get free tickets :) not that we can avail ourselves often, since
we are back in the States :(.)  If you know the person is truly not in a
financial position to pay, you could, if you were willing, barter
something with them for more instruction (I can see you Thursday evening
if you cook dinner for me...), but it sounds like you have gone at least
to the point where, as you say, you'd expect to start forking over cash,
so it seems reasonable to at least let them know about how things work
in the real world.

Depending on the instrument, there are some really good videos
available.  I play "at" the bodhran, and I didn't want Ken to pick up my
poor habits, so I got him Ray Gallen's "Celticbeat" video, and he's now
distressingly better than I am.  I've already started unlearning...

Beg schedule overload (as I'm sure yours is, this shouldn't require
prevarication).  "I'm sorry, I'm just so busy right now that I haven't
time to turn around.  I'm afraid if you can't make our weekly meeting, I
just won't have time to help you."  Add that everybody was a beginner
once and no one will mind if they aren't up to the level of everyone
else.  Personally, I think if you make yourself available weekly for
just this purpose and they "don't feel" they can avail themselves of it
for whatever reason, you have more than amply discharged any
responsibility.  If it were the local knight, he wouldn't feel the need
to change weekly fighter practice or offer personal instruction if one
guy couldn't make it, unless of course they had some sort of formal
(squire, man-at-arms) arrangement.  (Part of the learning process anyway
is learning to bear playing where other people can hear you; I'm sure my
first recital was much more terrifying because no one but my teacher had
heard me play!)

I'd leave off the "there's not much more I can teach you"; since you
acknowledge that it's not true, they probably realize it as well.  Try,
"I am still not where I want to be, which is why I have weekly practice
sessions.  The time I spend working on your skills is time I can't work
on my own.  I'm happy to help you, but remember I'm a student, too."  

And there's always the cricket bat.


Adelaide